Monday, September 13, 2010

Snipped and Spayed

By Pauly
Los Angeles, CA

Animal Hoarders.

Nicky stumbled upon Animal Hoarders one late night while flipping the channels. It's a spinoff of A&E's Hoarders (and not to be confused with TLC's Hoarding: Buried Alive. The animal hoarders are fucking gross with 20, 30, 40 feral animals roaming through their homes with piss and shit and puke everywhere. One woman had 65 cats with 20 kittens and 3 pregnant mothers. She never bothered to get any of them snipped or sprayed, or torn and frayed. Man, the foul bitter aroma of feline urine from one cat is disgusting. How about a dozen cats, or 65? If you toss a match in there, all of that ammonia might ignite.

Similar trait among animal hoarders? They all think that they are trained veterinarians by the simple fact they have multiple animals, and think they are helping animals but are actually hurting them.The renonkulous sums of money that they spend to feed the animals also baffles me. The ones who give up their bedrooms are sad cases.

I got sucked into this show fast. Nicky and I watched a five-hour marathon, fascinated by the unbelievable amounts of damaged souls. I'm not a fan of the reality genre, but the hoarding theme has triggered something inside me because I've touched on this on the Tao before. The different hoarding shows partially inspired a short story that I wrote titled Everest.

Hoarders (non-animal) come into two types: 1) sloppy lazy garbage freaks and 2) compulsive shoppers.

The fallout from constant bombardment of advertising causes weak-minded parts of the herd to become brainwashed compulsive shoppers, which spills over into a hoarding problems when they have no place to put their stuff. It boggles me that parents put their kids before their stuff. The first group of hoarders are train wrecks -- infestation of rats, roaches, trash everywhere, newspapers, magazines, even dead animals underneath piles of trash. Most of those cases are elderly people who have health issues that prevented them from cleaning, or they had too much pride to ask for help.

During the tour of hoarding house for the film crew, the hoarder always has one room that is packed to the ceiling with junk. The camera pans with dramatic background music to reveal years of neglect. That made me wonder that so many people have rooms like that in their brains -- emotional hoarding -- with all of your problems, phobias, and grudges locked away in a back room and spilling over into the hallways, and on the stairway.

Sometimes, you gotta throw that mental garbage out, but accessing the inner hallways and back rooms insider your head is not as easy as you think.

By the way, I'm waiting for a new show... Drug Hoarding.


  1. James4:52 AM

    I believe that these rooms where unpleasent items, feelings etc are called "oubliettes" - discussed in "Mind Palaces" it comes from the term for a hole in the floor of a dungeon where an unwanted / dangerous (normally political) criminal was dropped to be forgotten...

    Bring on "Drug Hoarding"!!

  2. Ernest8:43 AM

    Those hoarding shows are a trip.  You can practcally smell the houses through the TV.  Have you seen the Sir Patrick episode yet?  Instant classic.
    Drug hoarders already exists, it's called Intervention.  That's my favorite, but only for the first 3/4 of the show while they're behaving badly.  Once they start getting help it's boorrrring.  I HIGHLY recommend the episodes: Allison the "duster" (aeresol keyboard cleaner) addict, and Christy the meth/vodka head...

  3. Pauly1:12 PM

    I saw Sir Patrick --- that guy is just crazy.

    Intervention is hit or miss. I saw both episodes you mentioned. They were good, but on average, that show is not as compelling as Hoarders.

  4. Marissa3:56 PM

    How do you hoard drugs?  Wouldn't a drug addict by defintion be consuming everything that they get their hands on?

  5. Ernest3:44 PM

    Intervention is definitely hit or miss.  Did you see this week's episode?  Wow.  Wow.  I almost threw up.  The guy who wanted the psychologist to take off her shoes was ironic to say the least.  The level of denial and delusion of these hoarders is mind-boggling.  I do like Dr. Sazio though, she's like an older, hotter Tonya Harding....
    Good luck on This Week in Poker tonight!