Ramblings from a writer, traveler, and insomniac

 
Sydney Pic Dump

Feel free to click on the pics to see an enlarged view:

Kings Cross at Day


Kings Cross at Night


At the Sydney Opera House


Sleeping Bats


Wedding Photos in the Botanical Gardens


Billards at the Pub in Glebe


Hippiemobile


Ice Kills

posted by Pauly at 1/31/2007 09:36:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Justin's Vegemite Prop Bet Video

During the Aussie Millions, I lost a prop bet with Justin Shronk from Poker News at breakfast. If he ate an entire packet of Vegemite, I would buy his breakfast. Here's what happened...


Click here to view Justin's Vegemite video featuring cameos from The Poker Shrink and Cory-Ann.
posted by Pauly at 1/30/2007 11:10:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Almost a Golden God

On Saturday, I woke up in my hostel covered in skeeter bites. I passed out with my shirt off and the window wide open. They feasted on my flesh and when my bartender Kiwi roommate came home from work at 7:30am, he mentioned something about the series of bites on my stomach.

That was the last day in the hostel and as much as I wanted to stay due to social reasons (aka the hot German chick with no underwear and the cute nymphish chain smoking chick from the French Alps), I was happy to get out and find a different place to stay, with a better shower and a more comfortable bed. I had been sharing a room with only one other person who was never around, but I slept in the top bunk of a bunk bed and almost rolled over onto the floor in the middle of the night.

When I was in Byron Bay, I stumbled upon a travel website that boasted rooms at the Holiday Inn in Kings Cross for $150 Aussie per night. Since Brandon was going to be crashing with me for two nights, that meant the room would be not too expensive. I was way under budget and decided to splurge. Besides, most hotels in Sydney are around $200/night.

We wandered over to the hotel which was only a few blocks away. It was 10am and we had to wait until 2pm to check in. We were only there to stash our bags but luckily a room was available. We took it and I jumped right into the shower, a long hot shower where I spanked it twice. Brandon hopped on the internet and chatted up his lady friend while we figured out what to do for the day.

We headed over to Manly Beach and took a ferry from Circular Quay where we played thirty minutes of Chinese Poker. The ferries are green and yellow monsters that shuttle thousands of people from Sydney out to the northern beaches. Manly Beach was named so after one of the early British naval commanders floated by and saw manly looking Aborigines on the beach. (Oh, by the way Garth... I did some research and discovered that Australia Day was when the First British Fleet arrived in Sydney on January 26th, 1788 with 100 convicts, troops, and other colonists.)


Sculpture on Corso Street
Manly Beach is a mini-tourist trap, but there's plenty of small shops and eateries on Corso which leads you from the ferry terminal down to the beach. The beach was super crowded for a Saturday, especially on a three-day Aussie weekend holiday. Plus thee were different competitions going on... a lifeguard race and a rowing race which took up most of the beach.

We walked around and was bombarded by a nasty blitz of wind which kicked sand up and around everywhere. We picked the wrong day to head to Manly.


The best part of the beach was getting a cheap sandwich. There was a tent where they sold breakfast sandwiches. For $5, I got two sausages, two pieces of bacon and a fried egg with BBQ sauce. Yummy.




We looked at the map and decided to walk over to Shelly Beach where all the scuba divers were. Then we hiked into Sydney Harbour National Park. The climb up was not too bad and we had some amazing views of Manly Beach. We also experienced some wildlife such as lizards. We spotted on that had a tail that was three feet long.


This lizard freaked the shit out of us
After the hike, we decided to head back down to the beach. That's when Nigel called. He's is a publisher of a Australian Travel magazine and a devoted reader of my blogs who lives in Sydney. He invited me and Brandon over to his BBQ.

After we took a ferry back to Circular Quay, we headed over to Glebe to Nigel's place which was a few blocks from Ali's. Funny that we were hanging out in Glebe for two nights in a row, at a BBQ, drinking with strangers. But they weren't strangers... Aussies are extremely friendly and hospitable people. Nigel's friends were fascinated that Brandon was a "professional gambler" and that I got paid to travel the world and write.




Partying with fans. It was a surreal scene kinda like out of Almost Famous when the guitar player headed to a high school party and jumped off the roof into the pool exclaiming, "I'm a golden god!" Except that there was no LSD and no pool for me to jump into off the roof.

We hung out in the kitchen and drank heavily as they made mojitos from scratch. We got shitfaced and one of the guys wanted to challenge Brandon to a head-butting contest. I suggested that Brandon don't do it. He had size on everyone but Aussies are world champion head-butters. One drunk named Henry carefully inspected Brandon's head.

"I can't seem to find a weak spot," he said and dropped his offer to butt heads.

When the liquor ran out, Nigel yelled, "Off to the pub!" And about 20-25 people stumbled out into the streets and wandered into the pub a few blocks away. The basement had slot machines (or pokies as they call it).

Brandon and I played pool against Nigel and his buddy Gavin and it's safe to say the the Yanks are dominate pool players after we beat the Aussies 2-0. The bar upstairs was an actually fish tank where they served the drinks on. Trippy for sure. The bathrooms used Barbie and Ken dolls on the doors to indicate what sex bathroom you were supposed to go in.


The fish bar
When the pub closed, we headed to another bar down the street and sat in the back. We drank Coopers Pale Ale and played poker. Actually it was $2/hand and we'd all go in blind pre-flop. An Irish guy wandered up and joined us. We played four-way for a bit and the winner of the hand would take down $8 in $2 Aussie coins. I cracked Brandon's J-J with 6-5s after I rivered a flush. Nigel had Kings almost cracked by Brandon's A-Q. The flop was an Ace but Nigel rivered a two-outer to scoop the pot.


I ended up the big winner and won enough for cab fare back to King's Cross where the strung out hookers sit outside on milk crates looking for johns. When we stumbled out of the cab we could not get into our hotel. They make you ring a buzzer before they let you in.

"Please state your name and room number."

"McGuire," we both blurted out.

Except we didn't know what room we were in.

"Somewhere on the first floor," I screamed.

"143!" shouted Brandon.

"I'm sorry sir. There is no room 143."

"Fuck! My name is Paul McGuire and I'm on a room on the first floor. Here's my key," as I placed it up against the glass door.

"143!" Brandon kept shouting.

They eventually let us in and we wandered down the hall. Our room was 162.
posted by Pauly at 1/29/2007 05:08:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Aussie Day Pic Dump

Here are some random pics from Australia Day:


Wave that flag...


A view of Sydney from Darling Harbour


The Opera House from underneath the Harbour Bridge


The Opera House


Ali and Saram's BBQ


Sign on Ali's front door in Glebe


Sticker on my door in the hostel


Signs on Bondi Beach
posted by Pauly at 1/28/2007 08:30:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Australia Day

Friday was Australia Day and it celebrates the union of all the states into one sovereign nation. I have no idea if that is true or not because a very drunk guy told me that's what Aussie Day was and I'm too lazy to look up the correct definition on Wikipedia. In this instance, a local drunk's knowledge is all I need.

Australia Day is a national holiday similar to the Fourth of July. Plenty of flags, BBQs, and everyone gets off from work. Since Aussie Day was on a Friday, everyone had a three day weekend. The festivities started on Thursday with everyone getting shitfaced, including us.

I woke up hungover on Friday and wandered into Brandon's room where his two French femme roomies were busy getting ready for the day. We went to an internet cafe a few blocks from Hyde Park and checked email while I verified Ali's address in Glebe. Ali and I worked together for PokerStars in Las Vegas during the summer and I got to hang out with her in Melbourne. She invited us to a BBQ and Australia Day celebration and thanks to Google Maps, I figured out how to get to her house.

We had several hours to kill and wandered down by Darling Harbor. The area was packed with tourists and locals with plenty of kids running around and folks with temporary tattoos of the Australia flag on their cheeks or arms. We took photos of the harbor before we spotted a ferry. People were lined up in front of the Maritime Museum getting on the boat.

"Let's go," mentioned Brandon as he got in line.

"Where's it go?" I asked.

"I have no idea," he answered.

And that's one of the cool things about traveling in a place you've never been. The most exciting moments usually happen when you don't plan anything and go where the day and moment takes you. Brandon is an adventurous guy and is fun to travel with because he's willing to do things off the beaten path which are not included in guide books. There was a boat about to leave the Darling Harbor so we hopped on. It ended up being one of the coolest things we did in Sydney.

The ferry stopped at a few wharfs and ports and eventually went underneath the Sydney Harbor bridge where we could see people climbing the bridge. It costs $200 to do that which is a ridiculous price but there were dozens of people doing it. Eventually the ferry passed the famous Sydney Opera House before docking at Circular Quay, which is the Grand Central Station of ferries.

We still had some time to kill and hopped on a ferry back to Darling Harbor. Since it was Aussie Day, there terminal was packed with people. Perhaps we don't quite understand the system, but Brandon and I thought the ferry lines were a chaotic mess. We ended up getting on an express ferry to the Aquarium which was close to where we needed to go. Since the harbor was jammed with yachts, boats, and passenger ferries, we had to wait several moments before we docked.

We walked from the Aquarium to Glebe and picked up a bottle of wine at a bottle shop, which is the local version of a liquor store. Small bottles of SoCo were $30 and AlCantHang could consume that inside of an hour. We found Ali and Saram's house even though we thought we got lost. Glebe is one of the oldest sections of Sydney and lots of university students live in the area.

Ali was getting the food prepped while her husband Saram was showing us his new toy... a Wii system. Throughout the afternoon and evening, plenty of golf, tennis, and bowling would go down.

I met a ton of people and tried my best to remember everyone's name. They came from all walks of life and like most Aussie's I met, they were happy to meet Americans willing to come down under and travel in their amazing country. I chuckled when I heard a few AC/DC songs blast out of the stereo. AC/DC at a BBQ on Australia Day while drinking like a fish... that kinda summed up my afternoon.

I drank a lot of beer and the food was amazing. Lizzie worked the BBQ and there was plenty of lamb, steaks, and sausages. We sat out in the backyard and before the night was over, I was bitten a few times by either spiders or mosquitoes. The backyard was surrounded by gum trees with the eucalyptus leaves that koala bears eat.

We got very banged up after drinking for 8-9 hours straight and experiencing an authentic Aussie BBQ on Australia Day. Jules and Graham first introduced me to Aussie BBQ in Melbourne and I got to see one on a larger scale.

We headed back to the hostel and played some more Chinese Poker while the hot German girl with the white shorts and no underwear was hanging out and folding up her laundry as the bats continued to fly around. I think the German girl sent Brandon on tilt, because he didn't play very well. I was still lit up after he crashed and hung out talking to one guy from England, the chain smoking French girl, and an Aussie backpacker who has been traveling the world for two years. I must have passed out around 4am. My roommate, the Kiwi bartender, finally came home at 7:30 and woke me up. Of course when I went to take a piss I noticed all the bug bites. I was brutally attacked in my room. I passed out with my short off and must have been divebombed by the same skeeter a dozen times. Combined with the bug bites from Ali's backyard, little red bites peppered my entire legs and torso. I even had bites on my toes.

The hostel was a cheap alternative ($25/night) for lodging and getting to meet other travelers is always an enlightening experience, but after the bites I was ready to get out and pay a few extra bucks for a nicer shower and a room that was bug free.
posted by Pauly at 1/27/2007 09:25:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Thursday in Sydney

At first glance it appeared that Brandon got the better room in the Wood Duck Inn, a hostel on William Street a few blocks from Hyde Park in Sydney. He had two hot French girls in a four bunk room while I drew a guy in my two bunk room. After closer examination, I came out ahead.

"Dude talk about a bad beat," muttered Brandon. "That is, unless one of them blows me tonight."

Yeah, Brandon got the two snooty French girls while my roommate was a gregarious Kiwi who happened to be bartending at one of the cooler bars around the corner called The Gaff. We hit it off from the moment I introduced myself and he told me to come on down to the bar.

"It's Ladies Night," he said. "Free champagne from 9 to 10 in honor of Australia Day."

* * * * *
We had to find the STA travel office because Brandon left his UW student ID back in Seattle. He needed it to get a major discount on a train trip to Alice Springs so he could see Ayers Rock. We wandered around Chinatown looking for the office. He also needed a haircut. There were plenty of barbers with signs that read, "$10 haircuts."

"Maybe I should go to the gay part of town," Brandon suggested. "I will get a better haircut at a salon there."

The gay-lesbian part of town was far away and Brandon settled on one store. I snapped photos while he got a new haircut.

I was told to try Hungry Jacks which is the Aussie version of Burger King. For 4.95 we got an extra value meal... a double cheeseburger with a ton of mayo. It wasn't too bad.

We explored more of Sydney before the lack of sleep finally caught up with me. We went back to the hostel and I took a nap. Afterwards we headed to Kings Cross for dinner.

We stopped at the Fountain Cafe. It looked nice with cute waitresses. The bad part was that we were seated at a table next to a loud asshole. He was the first bad Aussie I met in over three weeks.

"Where the fuck is Crown Lager?" he shouted at the waitress. "What is this Perth? I expect that shitty service out there. Not in fuckin' Sydney."

"I'm sorry sir," the one girl said trying to muster up enough courage to stand up to the angry guy. "We ran out."

"That's fuckin' false advertising. I want to talk to your manager."

Another hot chick came back over and calmly explained that they ran out of Crown Lager. She brought them a complimentary bottle of champagne. But he was not satisfied and the verbal tirade continued.

"This is bullshit," he screamed. "False fuckin' advertising. See over there at that table? He's drinking Crown Lager. If you print that you have it in your menu and don't serve it to me, then it's false fuckin' advertising. Are you too fuckin' stupid to understand that?"

He did not give up and kept screaming about it like a spoiled little kid throwing a tantrum. We had already ordered our food and the place was crowded so we could not leave or switch tables.

"What a dick," mumbled Brandon under his breath.

Brandon is one of the most laid back guys you will ever meet. He attributes that to growing up in Hawai'i for the first 12 years of his life. He's totally chill but for the first time since I've known him... he was visibly rattled.

We scoffed down our dinner and quickly left. That guy's bad vibes ruined our meal. Bastard.

* * * * *
We went to The Gaff on Oxford Street located a few blocks from our hostel. We walked up to the bar and spotted several tables packed with young women waiting for the free champagne hour to kick in.

My roommate Ricky wandered over. We drank a jug (pitcher) of Toohey's and watched the tennis match. He told us that he's been traveling all over the world for eight years and doesn't meet too many Americans. He had some interesting political views and mentioned that out the US of A gets a bad rap overseas.

"Several Muslim countries were deeply affected by the tsunami," he said. "Yet, how much money did the Muslim countries donate? Very little. They didn't even care about their own people. Yet America was the biggest contributor to aid."

Ricky knew everyone in the bar, from the Swedish guys and German girls at our hostel who stopped by and the hot Brazilian bartender who served us more beer. We eventually started drinking with these two guys from the Aussie military. They were special forces and cool as shit. They recommended a few bars to visit. The girls started getting hammered and dancing on tables.

Irish poker pro David Callahan appeared out of nowhere. He randomly walked past the bar and saw a bevy of hot chicks and decided to investigate. We drank beers with him before we decided to leave.

We headed back to the hostel and drank up on the roof while we continued our heads-up Chinese Poker match. A few bats circled around above us as I picked up a few points on Brandon, the self-appointed semi-pro poker player.

"Are you Brant-dan?" said one of the girls who was cleaning the tables on the roof. "I have zor key."

Brandon lost his key and luckily, the staff found it. She was a nymphish twenty-something brunette with a funny accent. Time for another prop bet. Brandon picked France and I said Israel. We plopped two red $20 bills on the table.

"What's your name?" I asked.

"Alex," she said in an accent that hinted of French. I knew I was doomed.

"Where are you from?" inquired Brandon.

"France. Zee French Alps," she said as Brandon scooped up the money.

I really suck at "Guess what country." I should stop those prop bets. But I'm an action junkie. Alex was way cooler than Brandon's French roommates. She hung out with us while she chain smoked cigarettes. Total cliche. Alas, it happened.

"Vat are zoo playing?" she asked.

"Chinese Poker," I answered.

"Vait. I thought I recognized zoo," she said after taking a long drag. "I have zeen zoo on TV. Brant-dan, zoo won a poker tournament on TV in France, c'est vrai?"

Brandon shrugged his shoulders. Not only is he a rock star in Germany, but hot French chicks working in hostels in Australia recognized him.
posted by Pauly at 1/25/2007 06:10:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Random Byron Bay Pic Dump

Here are some pics from Byron Bay. Feel free to click on the photos to see an enlarged view:




Byron Bay, a view from the Lighthouse




Breakfast at The Balcony


Byron Lighthouse


Eastbound?


Ummm... no comment


Down by the beach...
posted by Pauly at 1/25/2007 09:44:00 AM | Permalink |

 
Night Train

We bought first class tickets from Byron Bay to Sydney. The last time I did train travel was in Japan when I followed Phish with Senor and Beano. We had first class passes on the bullet train and that was an amazing way to travel through Japan.

There is no train in Byron Bay and we had to take a bus to a town called Casino. There are no casinos in Casino, just the station where we could catch the night train to Syndey. The drive from Byron Bay to Casino was on a small two lane road with plenty of curves, twists, and hills as we navigated through lush farmland. It reminded me of Northern Vermont and I chuckeld when I saw signs that pointed out Koala crossings.

We finally got on the train. The snack bar was opened for about 15 minutes before they sold out of hot drinks and hot meals. I snagged a Lasanga before they ran out. Brandon opted for the meat pie. I had one in Melbourne and they are tasty.

We played Chinese Poker and I looked out the window before it got too dark and you could not see anything. I pondered life's mysteries and tried to visualize my next few months. I have no idea what the future holds with some recent wrinkles that my government has thrown into the money making machine of the online poker industry. The federalies are cock-blocking my livelihood and as they jerk around more and more online sites and banks and companies affiliated with online poker... I see my freelance clients dissapearing one by one.

I'm a writer trying to earn a living wage and in America that's almost impossible. Without poker, I struggled for a decade being dirt poor as I racked up 5 figures of debt. With the poker boom, I was able to climb my way out of misery and had a semblance of hope. I found several amazing friends and launched a freelance career and have been able to travel all around the world. Now it seems that all of this is slowly slipping away.

I anticapted this end of the party after the Republicans cowardly rammed the Internet Gambling Act down our throats in October when they attached it to the Port Security Bill. And that's why I saved almost every penny I made the last six months. The rainy day I was worrying about is on the horizon. There might be sunny skies again sometime in the future. But I can't sit and wait for that to happen.

I'm not going to give up writing. I will die as a writer, most likely deep in debt without any major works published. I accepted that as my fate when I chose to follow the calling to be a writer. I might never make what I did in the last six months, and that's OK. The good side is that I will have more time to travel the world and write about non-poker things and improve myself as a scribe and spend more times with friends and my brother.

I will eventually write a book about Las Vegas at the end of this year. If all goes the way I want it (and life never does), I can afford to take 2 years off to write that book and pen a screenplay. One of them has to be a hit. If not, I'm royally fucked and would have depleted my savings.

Moving on...

The train was nice but the trip was tough. I slept one hour total. The old man and woman behind me both snored in stereo whikle a little kid in the back of the car would not shut the fuck up. I tried to read and listened to music but could not fall asleep. Instead, I sat in the dark thinking about the next few months and the last three weeks (and how lucky I am and humbling this trip as been).

We arrived in Sydney at 7:10am and hopped a cab to the Wood Duck Inn on William Street a few blocks from Hyde Park. Our beds were not ready yet so we dropped off our bags. We were greeted by a smoking hot volumptuous German chick. Our jaws dropped when she let us inside. Drool soaked my shirt and I noticed that Brandon had to shift his erection so she would not see it. She led us up to the roof deck and I could not stop looking at her ass as we walked up several flights of steep stairs. She wore white shorts with no underwear. My, oh my. She spread out breakfast and invited us to eat. We had an amazing view of the city and ate toast. No vegemite.

We wandered through the park and ended up at an internet cafe. I checked my email and I have over 1,200 pieces of unread mail. I'm also exhausted. I haven't slept much since I arrived in OZ and the last few days have been rough. I don't expect to get much sleep the next few nights in the hostel, especially if that German chick wants to party. I have to be a good wing man for Brandon. He's got lots of fans in Germany after he made two final tables on the European Poker Tour. He's huge in Europe. He's like the David Hasslehof of poker players in the Motherland.
posted by Pauly at 1/24/2007 04:59:00 PM | Permalink |

 
I Can't Leave

Still in Byron Bay. Amazing place. Shecky left this morning after a good-bye breakfast at The Balcony. We are here for a few more hours. Then we have to take a bus to a town called Casino where we will get a night train to Sydney.

Brandon got shitfaced last night and drank a bottle of wine and 1/2 bottle of gin. We had a hot waitress serves us at an Italian cafe where we ate dinner. We gambled on where she was from. Brandon said Italy. I was convinced she was from Portugal. Shecky said Spain. We all tossed three red $20 bills onto the table.

"So where are you from?" asked Brandon.

"Spain," she answered.

Shecky slammed his hand on the table and scooped up $60.

We went to visit Byron Lighthouse. Brandon snapped this photo...


We saw sea turtles and took pics at the Eastern most point of Australia. Both Shecky and I have lady friends back in LA. We pointed out to sea and snapped photos in homage to the fact we are missing Nicky and Jen dearly especially since there are topless ladies running rampant on the beach. We can look but didn't touch. Brandon touched himself though.
posted by Pauly at 1/23/2007 06:48:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Byron Bay

Senor and Friedman told me that I'd fall in love with Byron Bay. And they were right.

We rented a car and drove from Surfer's Paradise in the Gold Coast and drove down to Byron Bay. Our motel has beach access and my room with Brandon is spacious. Shecky needs his own space and has his own room. He's a workaholic and gets the shakes when he's unplugged for more than a few hours.

Like a junkie needing to score a fix, Shecky found an internet cafe in town. That's where I am at 9am after crashing at 4am and popping generic vicodin while downing bottles of Boags. Shecky crashed early and Brandon and I headed down to the beach. There was a bonfire with about 30 people partying and we walked around checking out the bright stars in the southern skies. I spotted a few constellations that you never get to see in my neck of the woods. That was cool.

It's good to see Shecky get outside and get some sun. He bought a football so we can toss it around on the beach. Our plan today is to rent mopeds and drive up to the lighthouse. I also want to go to Nimbin to score some herbal supplements. That's where all the hardcore hippies and Aussie wookies live.

We played Chinese Poker at a beach side bar last night and I'm down for the trip. That's been the only gambling I've done. I played live poker a few times in Melbourne and only played online poker once since I arrived. Plus I haven't been smoking much weed. I guess I'm weening myself off two of my vices. The result... I'm putting on weight because I'm drinking a shitload of beer and eating more.

I got to watch the Pats-Indy game and was pleased to see Indy come from behind to win. Brandon and I wacthed cricket last night and he explained it some more to me. I think I finally have a basic understanding at what the fuck is going on.

We have one more day in Byron Bay. Shecky will be leaving us and flying back to Melbourne. Brandon and I will be taking a train to Sydney. We're staying in hostels the first few nights, including one near the red light district. On the things to do in Sydeny is to head over to Manly and Bondi beaches.

We're supposed to hangout with my friend Ali for Australia Day on Friday. She's having a BBQ and inviting friends over. That should be cool to celebrate with locals. Brandon heads back to Melbourne on Saturday and I want to head out to the Blue Mountains on Sunday. I'll book a swanky hotel my last two nights mostly because I'm under budget for the trip and more importantly so I can have some peace and quiet to write.

I'm supposed to go home in a week, but I really struggling with those emotions where I say, "Fuck it!" and stay here for another few weeks or pull the trigger and follow Brandon to Veitnam.
posted by Pauly at 1/22/2007 05:57:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Big Day Out - Video

Here's a quick video of Big Day Out. We were not supposed to take photos or video backstage, so I had to be super slick and shoot while the surly security guards were not looking. It features performances from The Killers, John Butler Trio, Jet, and Muse.


Click here to view the video via Bloglines or an RSS feed.

Shecky was supposed to get three tickets to Big Day Out for us. It had been sold out for months, yet he knew Tool's manager who said he'd put three tickets aside for us. When we showed up at Tool's hotel, there were only two tickets for us. Shecky was pissed and called up the manager. He apologized and not only gave us three tickets... but we got backstage passes. Talk about getting the hook up!

Since most of the bands we wanted to see were late afternoon and in the evening, we headed backstage and sat in a huge tent adjacent to the dressing rooms. There was free food and drinks and we found a table to sit down and play Chinese Poker. It was a little strange because members of random bands would be walking past us while Brandon Schaefer, Shecky, and I were gambling. The guys from Chemical Romance, Jet, The Killers, and Tool passed us at one time or another.

Shecky started out hot and I went South quickly. I had a 32 point swing in the first ten hands while Shecky picked up 16 quick points. Then Shecky went on severe BCPT (Backstage Chinese Poker Tilt) and was getting his ass kicked by Schaefer. Shecky's -36 swing destroyed him as Shaefer went on a rush. I wanted to end the game to go see John Butler Trio's set. The band had walked past us and headed on stage, but Shecky would not let me leave until he won a hand. That went on for about 12-15 hands and we ended up missing the first fifteen minutes of John Butler Trio. Bastard.

I had only been backstage at a major concert once... and that was Phish in Arizona in 1999. The Big Day Out backstage experience was unreal and surreal. When Kate Hudson walked past us, our jaws dropped. She's apparently banging the lead singer of Jet. At one point she bent over in front of me and squated for a few minutes so she could see Muse. Shecky poked me in the ribs and said, "That's the closest Kate Hudson will ever get to your cock."

Two feet away. Surreal. I was jotting down notes and the setlist and just like the scene from Almost Famous, I expected Penny Lane to take the pen out of my hand and toss it away. And yes, she's amazingly smoking hot in person.
posted by Pauly at 1/21/2007 06:43:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Big Day Out Pics

We had an amazing time at Big Day Out. Shecky hooked us up with free tickets and a backstage pass. We got to watch several of them bands... on stage. Unreal. Big Day Out was huge, like almost 100K people partying their ass off. Here are some pics:


The first thing we saw when we walked in...




Backstage during John Butler Trio


Brandon eats corn


Shecky eats corn


Hanging with the crowd during the Killers set


"Dude? You can't find me? I'm waving the kangaroo?"


Too bad they didn't flash us...




Brandon during Jet's set


Muse


More Muse
posted by Pauly at 1/21/2007 09:17:00 AM | Permalink |

 
The Gold Coast Day 1

After two long weeks at the Crown Casino in Melbourne, Australia, the Aussie Millions finally ended around 9pm on Friday. That's when Gus Hansen from Denmark beat a 19-year old internet prodigy (who dropped out of high school to play poker full time) from Champaign, Illinois named Jimmy "Gobboboy" Fricke. Hansen won $1.5 million Aussie bucks while Gobboboy won $1 million. Unreal.

When I was 19, I was smoking weed and drinking my eyes out while sitting on the porch of my fraternity house trying to finger shitfaced sororitiy girls.

After the final table ended, I went to dinner at a steakhouse with Tim and my boss Shecky. We ate there once before and it was overpriced, but an excellent meal. Our table was not ready, so we headed to the bar and bumped into some friends of Shecky. One of them is an Aussie named Ralph who is a well-to-do businessman who is sickly wealthy. He bought us a bottle of wine that cost somewhere near $2K. He doesn't just have a "black" Amex card... Ralph is such a high roller that he has a "Titanium" card and supposedly there's only like 50 of those on the planet. That card is literally made out of steel and comes with a 24-hour personal assistant... free of charge. I think his assistant is named Wang.

Anyway, Shecky told Ralph that we were having problems finding a room on the Gold Coast. Since we were so busy the previous two weeks, we kept putting off finding a room. It is the middle of summer and with the Big Day Out music festival nearby, there were no rooms available. Ralph picked up his mobile phone and dialed Wang and told him to set us up.

We eventually had dinner and I ordered the Black Angus porterhouse with a bernaise sauce. After dinner there was a big "players party" at one of the clubs in the casino. I got hammered and wandered around snapping photos of Gaz (one of my colleagues who is one of the more popular figures in Aussie poker) who hired me as his personal photographer.


Gaz, Pauly, and the Rooster's favorite Aussie... Cory-Ann
Of course I was hammered and passed out for a few hours before I had to get up, pack, check-out, and finish two articles which I had a deadline. One was for a magazine and the other for Poker News. I cranked out 1,500 and 3,900 words in less than three hours. I had already pre-written most of both pieces, but I worked as fast as I had ever worked hungover to all hell.

Pressed for time, I was lucky that Cory-Ann, one of my co-workers, checked me out of the hotel and put all my room charges on the company credit card. It was somehwere close to $600 with over $250 in internet charges, plus over $100 in phone calls to fuckin'' Citibank or Neteller. The rest was mini-bar charges and room service. Oh then there was the $32.99 breakfast buffet that was good but overpriced. I must have put over $500 in charges on my boss' tab. I wonder if he noticed? I kept signing "Shecky" at the various bars or at the breakfast buffet.

I had one hour to kill and walked along the Yarra River to smoke up the rest of my herbal supplements. I also ate some ice cream and soaked up my last moments in Melbourne. I met up with Brandon Schaefer and Shecky so we could head out to the airport. Schaefer and I are going to travel the rest of my time in Australia together, while Shecky is joining us for four days. Our plan was to head up to Surfer's Paradise for two days and catch Big Day Out music festival which is like Bonnaroo, Cochella, and Lallapolooza rolled into one. Then we'll spend two days in Byron Bay (per suggestions of Friedman and Senor), before we explore Sydney before I leave Oz and go home at the end of the month.

At the airport, we played Chinese Poker and I got smoked. Schaefer is a professional poker player (although he'd tell you he's a semi-pro) and Shecky used to be a pro and is now an executive at a global poker news organization. I was playing against two solid players and would have to shrug off my hangover if I wanted to win. No such luck.

We flew on the Aussie version of JetBlue called JetStar and the seats were cramped. The stewardesses were hot and you had to pay for your drinks and snacks. We finally arrived and the Gold Coast looks a little bit like Southern California or Florida. Lots of beaches. Lots of sun. Lots of hot chicks.

Ralph's assistant Wang ended up booking the Palazzo Versace which is like 600/night. Shecky told him it was out of our price range since we were staying two nights. Ralph said, "No worries mate!" And he picked up the tab. We love Ralph.

The Palazzo Versace is a snooty swanky 5 star hotel with marble floors and glasses with the image of Donatella Versace embedded in them. Our room is a one bedroom suite with a huge bathtub and balcony. Pictures pending but Jen Leo posted some pictures of Palazzo!

I checked my email and Nicky had just gotten into Las Vegas. She was hired to cover an event and got a comped room at Caesar's. She emailed the pics of her digs (which she said was bigger than her and Showcase's entire apartment) and it looked swanky. I shot her an email back and told her how she'd love the Palazzo Versace. Ultimate luxury.

We headed down to a surfer's bar down by the beach as we overlooked the Ocean. We drank pitchers of beer. They call them "jugs" here and they were $10. What a bargain. We OD'd on nachos and potato wedges (mixed with sourcream and a sweet chili sauce). We headed back to the hotel and drank alongside the pool. The people there were dressed up in tuxes and sleek black cocktail dresses.

"I feel like the Beverly Hillbillies," joked Shecky.

We were out of place wearing our beach wear as everyone around us looked like they were dining out in Monte Carlo. That's when we busted out the playing cards and sat down to drink and play Chinese Poker. Keeping it real.

The stars were fantastically bright and a group of tanned 17 year old high school chicks in sundresses sat next to us. Schaefer could not stop checking them out as we played cards and I wondered if any of them had any weed. I was down a lot of money after that terrible session of cards in the airport and came storming back while Shecky lost a bunch of money. Of course, Schaefer was winning the most. And he should. He's the pro.

The girls eventually left and we stumbled back to the room. I woke up hungover. Again. That seems to be par for the course since I've arrived two plus weeks ago.


I fI ever write a book about Australia, it will be titled, "Hungover in Oz."
posted by Pauly at 1/20/2007 06:45:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Aussie Food Pics

Here are pics of food to let you know what I've been eating or you can catch a glimpse of my friends' eating habits:

Penne Bolognese from Cervo


Brandon's Pumpkin Raviloi


Pizza with spicy chicken and bacon from Automatic


Dinner at Lucky Chances


Justin's Breakfast Buffet


Lamb Salad


Sorbet in Strawberry Soup


My Morning breakfast at Margo's
posted by Pauly at 1/18/2007 05:54:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Slacking

Covering poker tournament sucks the life out of me. I never have any time to write for myself and the last thing I want to do when I get back to my hotel room is to write. Since I have an end of day recap to write for PokerNews, I'm either working on it before I crash at 4am or waking up early to finish it off.

I spent some time every morning watching Australian TV which is basically a hybrid of American TV. One of the local Fox affiliates runs several hours of The Simpsons every morning. I also watch Sportscenter and Australian Sportscenter. Not to mention by daily fix of cricket, which I'm starting to get the hang of.

The Australian Open tennis tournament is in full swing and several pros are sharing the same hotel. I've seen Maria Sharapova a few times wandering around.

Melbourne had a blackout today. It was 40 degrees Celsius or 104 degrees in American measurements. The lights went out in the Casino during one of the breaks due to the intense heat and overuse of AC in the city.

I wanted to go eat breakfast with my co-workers at 11am but the buffet was closed so we headed to a cafe called Automatic which serves breakfast until 4 PM. I've had the free range omelets there before with bacon and cheese. Instead of breakfast, I opted for an $17 personal pizza with bacon, chirizo sausage, onions, and spicy chicken.

I also convinced Justin (our video/radio producer) to eat a packet of Vegemite. If he did, I offered to pay for his entire breakfast which included a personal pizza with salami on it. He's an Italian kid from Philly and loves salami. He downed it and said it was super salty. Disgusting. I lost but I love food prop bets.
posted by Pauly at 1/16/2007 09:23:00 AM | Permalink |

 
Aussie Millions Day 1A Recap

We taped a segment early on Monday discussing Sunday's action at the Aussie Millions Championship. Here's the video:


Click here to view the video of Shecky and myself.
posted by Pauly at 1/15/2007 07:20:00 AM | Permalink |

 
Some Writing

Here are a few articles that I wrote for Poker News in the past week or so:

Erick Lindgren Wins $1 Million
Dr. Pauly's Day 4: Rebuy!
Gary Benson Wins Event #4
Day 3 Recap: Marathon Omaha
Day 2 of the Aussie Millions
Aussie Arrival

posted by Pauly at 1/13/2007 02:29:00 AM | Permalink |

 
Another Pic Dump

I went to the Melbourne Aquarium yesterday with Dr. Tim. Here are some pics of Jellyfish:














posted by Pauly at 1/12/2007 03:39:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Food Court

Justin (the dude who produces the radio show) and I headed to the food court in the Crown Casino a few minutes ago for a mid-afternoon snack. He got a salad and I ordered a sandwich at deli-like place.

"Can I have a chicken breast sandwich with mayo and cheese?" I said.

"Do you want Mahhhh (inaudible)?" the girl behind the counter said.

"Can I have a chicken breast sandwich with mayo and cheese?" I said a little slower.

"Do you want Mahhhh (inaudible)?" she said again as she dipped a knife into a yellow tub of goo.

"Oh, margarine," I said as I felt like an idiot.

"Mayo?" she said as she pulled up a tube of mayo.

"Yeah," I said as I shrugged my shoulders.

Yes, they put margarine on everything out here.
posted by Pauly at 1/10/2007 11:10:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Five Random Pics

Here are a few more that I snapped the last few days:


Prop bet city....


Walk this way


Hungover on the Radio


Playing in the Media/Celebrity Event


G'Morn from Melbourne
posted by Pauly at 1/10/2007 05:05:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Good, Bad, and Ugly

Good... I dig mint biscuits, which is a local snack similar to those chocolate covered mint Girl Scout cookies. The people in Australia are simply amazing and friendly. I'm addicted Boag's beer. Aussie tap water is on par with NYC. I've met several fans of my poker blog, which blows me away. Jules and Graham's wonderful hospitality made my transition here smooth. The entire Poker News staff is cool as shit. Tim Lavalli's stories are some of the most entertaining that I've ever heard. Shecky is a cool boss. The Crown Casino and Aussie Millions staff were pleased with my work so far. I find myself watching at least twenty minutes of cricket every day even though I have no idea what's going on. And there's a slight chance I fly to Paris for a week as my next assignment.

Bad... I got my credit card stolen. Sort of. It will take three business days to get a new one and even though Citibank assured me that I won't get stuck with the overseas Fed Ex charges... I don't believe them. Professional Keno Player Neil Fontenot sent me a package (prior to my departure for Australia) to Nicky's apartment in Hollyweird via UPS, which never arrived although UPS says it was delivered yet Nicky nor Showcase signed for it which means someone stole it or UPS is lying. Although we kicked ass in rehearsals, we taped the first segment of the radio show for Poker News and it was flat.

Ugly... I've been up for 41 straight hours and have not done any high altitude training in five days. After sitting on the phone with Citibank for fifteen minutes and unable to understand what their overseas outsourced customer service rep was telling me, I snapped at the person on the phone and said, "I have no idea what you are telling me. I refuse to continue this conversation unless you connect me to someone in North America." I've been having thoughts about ending my most precious piece of work on the internet... Truckin'... after almost five years of existence because I don't have the time to put into each issue every month and it's a struggle to get quality stories even though friends of mine have continuously promised me pieces that have never materialized.
posted by Pauly at 1/09/2007 06:31:00 AM | Permalink |

 
Aussie BBQ

On Sunday night, Jules invited me over to her house for dinner. She lives a short cab ride away from the Crown Casino where I'm living and working. When I got in the cab, I showed the driver the address.

"Can you do me a favor?" he asked as he handed me a map. "Can you look up the exact street?"

I snatched the map out of his hand and looked it up. After three minutes of sorting through the index I gave up and called Jules. She gave me more detailed directions and I relayed those to the cab driver. I handed him back the map.

"Do you not like seat belts?"

"Oh, yeah... I'll put it on," I said as I buckled up.

There's a weird Australian law that all passengers in taxis must wear seat belts. I obliged and we started talking about New York City and he told me that people in Melbourne were more friendly than people in Sydney.

We eventually arrived at Jules and Graham's house, but made the wrong turn a few blocks from her house.

Jules travels a lot for work and understands what it feels like to have to constantly live in hotels and be away from home. I've been on the road for over two plus years, so I welcomed the opportunity to get some authentic home cooking. She fired up the BBQ and we feasted on steaks with mash potatoes topped with a delicious mushroom and onion wine sauce. I was in heaven and Graham's dog was eying my scraps the entire meal when he wasn't running around humping things. The dog, not Graham.

Here are some pics:


Shrooms drenched in wine




The grand finale


Junior


Junior licks my plate clean
After dinner, we drank some more. That's all I've been doing in Melbourne... drinking. I played poker last night and shot more craps. I'm down over $550 Aussie bucks gambling so far.
posted by Pauly at 1/08/2007 01:15:00 AM | Permalink |

 
First 24 Hours in Melbourne

My room at the Crown Casino is pretty swanky. The bed is comfortable and the shower is strong. The water is drinkable in most of the cities and I tried it out. Not too shabby. It will save me a few bucks everyday buying bottled water.

The local TV is interesting. I love watching TV in other countries to see what they see. There were plenty of US stations and a couple of Fox channels. I'm in Rupert Murdoch land so that makes sense. Australians love horse racing, and there are two channels dedicated to the sport. BG would be in heaven.

The casino has over 40 restaurants including a large food court that is dominated by Asian food. There's a hotdog and spuds place and a pizza place but all the Asian food looks interesting. There's Mandarin, Cantonese, Japanese, Thai and Malaysian eateries. I had a delicious Green Tea milkshake for $4.50 at the sushi bar and I nearly jizzed in my pants. For lunch on Saturday, I ordered a pressed chicken breast sandwich with cheese and spicy mayo. I sat outside along the Yarra River and ate while I brushed away a dozen or so flies.

I cashed about $1,000 US at the casino cage and got a decent exchange rate. I got $1,200 Aussie Dollars which I'm going to use $1,000 to play poker with and keep $200 as spending money. I lost about $100 shooting craps and I've yet to play poker.

During a quick tour of the vast poker room, I bumped into some old friends that I know from covering poker in Las Vegas like Dr. Tim and The Barracuda, who is an Aussie. I also saw a few poker players and familiar faces that I know including Shannon Elizabeth, who played in the first event (of thirteen events) at the Aussie Millions.

During my first few hours in Melbourne, I was in that travelers haze where I was very uncomfortable with my new surroundings. I walked around the casino for an hour or so soaking everything in as I felt completely out of place. Perhaps it was the lack of sleep, but after a quick nap all of that changed.

After barely sleeping on my flight, I was exhausted. I asked for a wake up call and passed out for two hours. I eventually woke up and headed down to the lobby to meet my friend Jules for drinks and dinner. I felt normal again when I met up with Jules and Graham. Hanging out with locals always seems to give me the confidence that I'm not a total freak in a strange land.

Although Jules is Canadian, she's been living in Melbourne for almost two years. Her husband is a Kiwi who has been living in Australia for a very long time. Both helped me adapt much easier by giving me random social tips. One of those things was figuring out what kind of beer to drink. My buddy Aussie Garth suggested a lager called James Boag's, as did Graham. They were both right. Smooth and tasty.

We drank at Servo in the casino, an outdoor patio cafe/bar along the Yarra River. We drank for a while before we hopped in a cab to Lygon Street, which is considered Melbourne's Little Italy. We dined at a swanky place called Domini. I ordered the Tri-pasta which was a combination of gnocchi, spinach tortelini, and linguine Bolognese. Amazing dinner.

We headed to a pub down the street and sat outside. I switched to pints of Stella as I soaked up the Saturday night scene. I like to people watch and observed. We drank and talked about a spectrum of topics as I really got to get to know Jules and Graham a little bit better. My only previous interaction with Jules had been when she grabbed my ass at the bar in the MGM sports book last July. She became forever enshrined as part of the CBGC, which is an acronym for the Canadian Butt Grabbing Chicks. She and her buddy Kat from Toronto molested a slew of us during a bloggers gathering. And I loved every second of it.

We drank until Midnight before we headed back to the casino. By that point, I was spent and the beer made me sleepy. I passed out in my clothes and woke up four hours later. With a splitting headache, I took the fourth longest piss of my life. I drank two glasses of water and popped four Motrins. I called for a wake up call and finally undressed as I crawled underneath the covers. It took me a while to fall asleep, but I finally fell out and logged for four straight hours of slumber. I had about eight hours of sleep total inside of a nine hour stretch. That's a ton of sleep for me.

I woke up hungover, but somewhat refreshed from the lack of sleep. I put on ESPN and they showed the NBC feed of the NFL playoff games. I felt better knowing that I'd be able to watch the games, although I have to get up at 5am to watch the Jets game on Monday morning. I'll suck it up for Gang Green.

I uploaded a few pics and wrote for a while before my 11am brunch with my boss Caldwell. He gave me my mobile (cell) phone and now I have an Australian phone number! We also brainstormed about ideas for our radio program which we'll begin taping segments as early as Monday. We don't officially go live on the air for almost another week.

We ate outside the casino at an Italian place that had breakfast and pizza. A weird combination. I asked for an iced tea and it was very strange. Caldwell spent a lot of time in South Carolina, so he appreciates a good iced tea. This one was super sweet and might have had a splash of lemonade or something bitter. At any rate, I drank it all. I ordered a free range omelet with undercooked bacon, cheese, and onions with two pieces of toast. Eggs down under. Not too shabby. The waiter gave us a bowl filled with assorted jellies including Vegemite. I offered Caldwell $500 US to eat a small portion. He refused. Vegemite is prop bet heaven but tastes like shit.

I charged up my phone and called my mother to let her know I was alive. I also called Nicky in LA because she was missing me and wanted to hear my voice. I kept both calls short (under two minutes) before I sat down to write my first article for Poker News which I tentatively called Aussie Arrival.

I have a few hours to kill before I head over to Jules and Graham's house for an authentic Australian BBQ. I'm craving another Green Tea milkshake and itching to play cards. Time to feed my addictions.
posted by Pauly at 1/07/2007 12:03:00 AM | Permalink |

 
Aussie Pic Dump

I took these yesterday in Melbourne:


Along the Yarra River


Aussie Bucks


James Boag's Beer


The Old Train Station


Tri-Pasta Dinner at Domini's

posted by Pauly at 1/06/2007 06:41:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Landed

Either God (if he exists) or the powers to be who handled the seating for my UAL flight from LAX to Sydney has to have a wry sense of humor. I was able to upgrade to Economy Plus for $99 after refusing to pay $5K for an upgrade to business class. For $99, I was still stuck in coach, but gained five inches of extra leg room and a coveted aisle seat.

I needed the extra leg room for the huge boner that I promtly popped when the hottest chick (a cross between Jessica Alba and Carmen Elektra) on the flight sat down. If I was sitting next to her on a JetBlue flight from JFK to Las Vegas, I would have pegged her for a stripper.

We shared the middle section seats and both had aisles seats. The two seats next to either of us were empty. Like most Australians I've met, she was friendly, cordial, funny, and extremely chatty as she bombarded me a ton of questions about why I was traveling to Australia.

"I'm a writer," I explained. "I got hired to drink regularly at the Crown Casino and get paid to write about it."

"Sounds lovely," she added. "Wish I could get a job like that."

I had one of those moments, "I can't believe I'm getting paid to do this."

That's when the old lady in front of me switched seats. In her place was a young mother with a two year old. On the verge of tears. In the seats across from me were a young couple with another baby.

Sense of humor? Indeed. One hot chick negated by two babies. Where were my pharmies?

That's the one thing I have a tough time dealing with. Babies. Crying babies on long flights.

The flight from LAX was delayed which was the first of several crappy moments. The three meals they passed off for ffood sucked ass. Plus, I barely slept about two or three hours over the course of the 14.5 hour flight.

I sat through four movies; three bloody awful flicks and Little Miss Sunshine. The baby in front of me started crying at the Louvre scene in The DaVinci Code and by the end of the flick, both babies were crying in stereo. I suspect they didn't like Tom Hanks fucked up hair or they loated the script from Akiva Goldsman.

That's when I popped the first valium after I ordered a beer. I was saving the pharmies for an emergency. That was one. I almost wanted to kill myself when I decided to watch Guardian, the awful Coast Guard flick with Kevin Costner and Ashton Kutcher. I should be shot because I watched the entire thing. I wanted to talk to the hot chick but she was sleeping after drinking a glass of wine and popping what looked like two sleeping pills somehwere near Hawaii.

I read one hundred pages of a Dave Eggers memoir and watched four episodes of 30 Rock before the hot chick woke up and chatted me up the remainder of the flight. I missed the first glimpses of Australian soil as my plane landed because I was fixated on the hot chick's cleavage.

Welcome to OZ.
posted by Pauly at 1/05/2007 05:43:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Australia Bound


Me looking out at the Pacific Ocean
(photo by Change100)
In a few hours, I will be flying to Melbourne, Australia to cover the Aussie Millions for Poker News at the luxurious Crown Casino, which is the largest casino in the Southern Hemisphere.

I will be writing a daily recap of the Aussie Millions on the Poker News website. In addition, John Caldwell and I will be doing a live two hour radio broadcast/show from the floor of the Crown Casino. Yes, Radio Free Pauly is back. I'll post the link to the radio broadcast shortly.

And of course, visit the Tao of Poker for random updates, poker pictures, and links as I head all the way to the other side of the world to play cards. I will be posting stories and pictures here at the Tao of Pauly.

Sometime this spring, High Roller magazine will also be publishing a feature article about my adventures and hijinks Down Under. Sweet.

And here's the best thing about the gig... not only is Poker News paying all of my expenses (flight and hotel accomodations to Australia are pricey), but I'm also getting a $50/day per diem which is to cover my bar tab. Yes, Poker News and the Crown Casino threw in a free $50 bar tab everyday to keep me happy. Perks of being a faux doctor with a blog.

The trip is not all business. I'll have about two weeks to myself to explore the country. Garth gave me several great ips about his home country, so I feel as though I had access to privy information that not all travelers get to see and hear. There's a Tool concert that I'm going to see with Caldwell. I will get to hang out with Jules in Melbourne, while Brandon Schaefer and I head up the coast to Sydney and Brisbane shortly after the Aussie Million's is over. There's a huge summer music festival going on while I am there, so I'll be able to combine several of my passions (poker, traveling, music, and writing) into one trip. Epic.

The only bad thing (aside from missing the Jets in the playoffs) is that I heard nasty rumors that the Untied Airlines flight from LAX to Sydney, which I happen to be taking, is the worst international flight in the history of aviation. Old plane, cramped germ-infested seats, geriatric stewardesses, awful food, and smelly crappers. Sounds like I'm about to embark on a fun filled 17 hour flight. I have two books, a fistful of pharmies, and I've downloaded several hours of TV shows like The Office and 30 Rock onto my iPod to keep me sane. If all else fails, there's always booze.

Stay tuned for Aussie Millions updates...
posted by Pauly at 1/04/2007 11:56:00 AM | Permalink |

 
Truckin' - January 2007, Vol. 7, Issue 1

The first issue of 2007 has been published. Yes, I'm finally early with an issue. Let's hope that I can stay on schedule this year.

1. Merry Ethan by Paul McGuire
When I was done with my public display of urination, The Rooster stood in front of the bar with Ethan Hawke who smoked a cigarette. That's when I yelled out, "Yo Ethan, who's better in the sack? Winona or Uma?"... More

2. By Mennen by Otis
I can't remember where I read it, but for some reason I believe that Adolf Hitler was so concerned about potential body odor that he went to extreme measures (I think it was surgery) to alleviate perspiration. Of course, I may be making this all up... More

3. Pulling a Dawn by Dawn Summers
She cleaned up the spill with paper towels and soap-soaked sponges and carefully picked up every piece of broken glass. Well, almost every piece. She apparently missed a shard that had slid near the fridge, but her bare heel stepped up to the plate and snatched it right up when Dawn went to get some butter. Dawn said some bad words as she left bloody heel prints from the kitchen to the bathroom... More

4. Reunion by Doog
For the first time, Sean noticed the evidence of years' passage on her face – the small wrinkles around her eyes and mouth, the youthful freshness lost from her skin. She was no longer the perfect girl he remembered from ten years ago, but she was certainly a very beautiful woman... More

5. The Tulsa Incident by Sean A. Donahue
I had to alert the authorities, I had to let them know that something shady was going on here, something wasn't right. I slowly started back toward my car, careful not to make any noise as I passed the men's room... More

6. Shadow Boxing by Nick Cantwell
We met in a Deli. I'd just finished training.
I spilt her coffee as I squeezed my big ass past her table.
I bought her another one.
She asked me what I did.
Punchbag.
Boxer I told her... More

The first issue of Truckin' in the new year includes a story from one of my favorite writers, Otis, about sweating in Las Vegas. We have some old faces contributing to the new year issue such as Sean A. Donahue and Doog. Nick Cantwell from London shared a poem, while this issue marks the Truckin' debut of Dawn Summers. I laughed and I cried as I read about her Thanksgiving. And keeping with a holiday theme, I have a story about crashing a Christmas party with The Rooster.

I ask that if you like these stories, tell your friends! Feel free to shoot me an e-mail if you know anyone who is interested in being added to the mailing list or if you'd like to write for Truckin' in the future.

Thanks again to you the readers for wasting your precious time with Truckin'. Until next time.
posted by Pauly at 1/03/2007 06:24:00 PM | Permalink |

 
Ten Minute Wednesdays

I passed out in overtime of the now infamous Boise State and Oklahoma game. I barely slept the night before and after a long drive back from San Francisco, I was wiped out. Nicky watched the rest of it and I could hear both her and the guys who live in the apartment upstairs screaming about the action.

Since I went to bed so early, I woke up super early on Tuesday and started cranking out random things on my list of things to do before I leave for Australia. Like go to the bank and the cleaners. I still have to do laundry and call my credit card companies to let them know I'll be overseas for a month. I called my broker and we discussed my financial strategy for 2007.

I finalized the Pauly's Pub fantasy pools. My brother Derek won two of my pools (College Football and Grid Iron), while my buddy from college Brad S. won the prestigious Pigskin Pick'em Pool. That was the second time he won. And poor Jerry. He finished in second place for the third year in a row! Always a bridemaid, Jerry...

Congrats to the money winners in the 2006 Pauly's Pub Pigskin Pick'em NFL Pool:

1. how bout a fresca (BradSinger) $400
2. Well T'anks for Nuttin' (Jerry) $200
3. Mean, Dumb, and Uglies (ScurvyDog) $100
4. Austin Drunks (MattS) $60

I was pissed off at first, but now I'm very disappointed that I got stiffed close to $100 this season by entrants who did not pay. Combine that number with last year's football pool with 2006 March Madness, I had to pay over $200 out of my pocket in these pools, instead of paying out less than what I promised. I try to be a man of my word and if I say I'm going to pay out a specific amount, then I stick to that. By the way, thanks to a stand up guy like CJ who offered to send me money to cover the loss. I appreciate your act of kindness. I'm simply going to write this off as an entertainment expense.

I had close to one thousand emails to sort through that built up over the last few weeks. Most of it was junk mail or shill sites wanting links to my poker blog. I've been answering emails at a record pace over the past hour, and I'm still way behind. I need an email intern.

I still have to crank out Truckin' in between now and tonight. I expect to get it done. I don't have a choice. I have a trip to the bank still on my list in addition to buying a bathing suit so I can look hip on Bondi Beach.

I watched Jack Ass 2 last night and some of the scenes were pure sickness. Lots of puke and shit in this one. I wanted to go see The Good German or The Good Shepherd, but due to time constraints, a trip to the movie theatre seemed a waste of time with so many errands to run. Wheaton wrote an enticing review of The Good Shepherd, so much so that I hope it's still playing in February when I get back from Australia.

On Tuesday, I ate breakfast at John O'Groats and got their infamous French Toast with the best fuckin' bacon in LA. We actually ate dinner in the Valley. And I suggested it, because Mexicali is one of my favorite Mexican joints. Nicky and I met up with her sister and boyfriend as I drank Red Stripe and ate a Cobb Salad Chicken burrito. Yummy.

I downloaded the last four episodes of 30 Rock and the last two episodes of The Office via iTunes. I now have three hours or so of stuff to watch on my iPod for the flight to Oz. I added a couple of random Tool albums in a quick crash course of their last few years of work. I'm going to see them in Melbourne with Caldwell.

I'm supposed to meet Joe Speaker for lunch in a few hours downtown and later tonight, I have my farewell dinner with Nicky, Showcase, and his girlfriend. Hijinks will ensue.
posted by Pauly at 1/03/2007 11:10:00 AM | Permalink |

 
Hello 2007: My Morning Jacket at the Fillmore

There's nothing better in life than getting to see one of your favorite bands play a New Year's Eve show and ringing in the new year with a bunch of happy souls.

I had one of the best New Year's Eves since 1999. Sure there were two others NYE moments that stand out such as 2002 (the infamous Phish reunion at Madison Square Garden in NYC) and in 2003 (Phish's four show run in Miami which was the beginning of the end of Phish and the beginning of the end of my morbid depression), but those nights didn't compare to 2006 in San Francisco.

Over the last ten or so years, I've made the decision to see a band play on New Year's Eve. From experience, I've learned that New Year's Eve tends to be not as cool as expected and that it's considered amateur night by seasoned professional partiers like AlCantHang. So to combat that, I have chosen concerts to go to. I love the bands so it's almost like any other show, but there's no let down about the romanticized notions of New Year's Eve. So instead of standing in the corner of a lame party, I'm dancing my ass off with some of my favorite bands.

1998 Phish (NYC)
1999 Phish (Big Cypress, FL)
2000 Galactic (San Francisco, CA)
2001 Vida Blue aka Page's band (NYC)
2002 Phish Reunion (NYC)
2003 Phish (Miami, FL)
2004 Sick! I almost went to see Wilco/Flaming Lips in NYC
2005 Lame party
2006 My Morning Jacket (San Francisco)

I had an amazing year with plenty of ups and downs. Live music made a tremendous return to my life and I got to see both Vegoose and Bonnaroo along with several Panic and Galactic shows and I fell in love with a couple of new bands such as My Morning Jacket and Tea Leaf Green. MMJ's Midnight show at Bonnaroo pretty much body slammed me. I had not been blown away by a band like that since I saw Galactic for the first time.

I had the opportunity to see Panic, Trey, Particle, and Galactic on NYE. And I blew off all of those to spend it in San Francisco with Nicky seeing My Morning Jacket. She thought it was the show of the year. For me, it was pretty close. Easily Top 5, maybe even Top 3. But I do know this... it will go down as one of the best MMJ shows I'll ever see. The yardstick has been molded. MMJ NYE at the Fillmore!

We woke up early on Sunday to drive from Hollywierd to San Francisco. I wanted to stay and watch the Jets beat up on the Raiders en route to a playoff spot. But we had to leave after the first quarter. Thank God for the game on the radio, which we listened to on the drive up on I-5.

We had a rough patch of traffic and arrived in San Francisco 30 minutes later than expected. I found a good deal on a room at the Cartwright Hotel, a block off of Union Square. It was a swanky place in an amazing location.

The suit at the desk made me sign a waiver saying that I will not be throwing a New Year's Eve party in my room. The room was spacious and we had free wifi. The only thing that sucked was that it cost $35 to valet the car. With no parking in that part of town, we had no choice. But it was New Year's Eve and I wanted to go all out.

Showcase bought us a bottle of Moet and we tossed the bottle on ice as we wandered around Union Square area. We ate dinner and Nicky did a little shopping for a warmer coat. We were going to have to walk the 15 blocks from our hotel to the Fillmore because there was no way I was going to drive on NYE and we knew that there would be no cabs available. We headed back to the room to partake in the champagne and started the pre-party. The walk to the Fillmore took a little longer than expected. But we arrived just in time as the opening band took the stage.

Wax Fang is also from Louisville, Kentucky. They are a power trio and have an interesting sound to them. All of them are long haired and they were dressed up like cheerleaders which was both humorous and disturbing in the same breath. On their myspace page, they mention that they sound like "sunset strip club soda pop art gallery"... um whatever that means. They also like calling themselves the "prefect dive bar band." At any rate, they were entertaining as the opening act.

The Fillmore is a historic venue to see music. For over four decades, some of my favorite musicians have taken the stage to showcase their sound. This instance, the venue was draped in silk cloth paintings to make it look like we were standing outdoors. It fit the theme for the night.

12.31.06 My Morning Jacket, The Fillmore, San Francisco, CA

Set 1: "Two Tone T-Bone" intro > One Big Holiday, What A Wonderful Man, The Way That He Sings, Gideon, Off the Record, It Beats 4 U, Lowdown, Lay Low, The Dark, Golden, Dondante, Run Thru, They Ran

Set 2: New Year Countdown > Celebration (Kool and the Gang cover), All Night Long (Lionel Richie cover), Careless Whisper (George Michael cover), I Could Never Take The Place Of Your Man (Prince cover), Cobra, Phone Went West, Honest Man, The Bear, Steam Engine, Wordless Chorus, Easy Morning Rebel, Dancefloors, Highway To Hell (AC/DC cover), Anytime, Mahgeetah > Outro

The band started the show at 10:30pm with a piece of performance theatre as they lit a campfire onstage behind a see-through veil. That went on for about five minutes as it began to snow inside! Phish had a snow machine for the Reunion at MSG, but the MMJ snow was on a smaller scale. That got everyone in the room excited. The crowd was an interesting mix of fans... hippies and hipsters unite! Aside from the super drunk girl behind us who kept banging into us from time to time, the crowd was friendly and into the show.

One Big Holiday is their standard opener. They start the first few chords before he silk curtain drops from the stage to expose the band as the crowd went apeshit. The highlights in the first set included One Big Holiday, What A Wonderful Man, Gideon, Lay Lown, Dondante, and They Ran. MMJ played a first set that was about 1:20 in length before they took a five minute break.

At 11:55pm, MMJ took the stage again and Jim James thanked everyone possible for an amazing year and an amazing evening. The fact that the management at the Fillmore asked them to do a three show run to close the year including an epic NYE show is a testament to their musical talents. My Morning Jacket is the real thing and I was fortunate that I got to ring in the new year with the MMJ extended family.

The did the countdown and hundreds of white balloons fell from the ceiling in one of those magical NYE moments. Nicky gave me a wet and sloppy kiss and balloons kept falling as the band busted into a series of four random cover songs. The start of 2007 began with Celebration by Kool and the Gang. The entire floor of the Fillmore began bouncing from everyone dancing hard as Jim James belted out, "Celebrate good times, come on!"

Then they got weird and freaky and did a mellow version of Lionel Richie's (yeah that's Nicole's dad) classic All Night Long. Next up was a hilarious version of Careless Whisper. If you don't know what Jim James looks like, think of a guy who hasn't shaved or cut his hair since 2000. Then think of that guy wearing an oversized styrofoam hat and waving around a cap gun while crooning the audience with a George Michael cover. Classic.

They finished up their four cover songs in a row with a Prince tune before they went back to their material. Bear and Wordless Chords were the highlights of the second set along with the last three song stretch of AC/DC's Highway to Hell and their epic songs Anytime, then Mahgeetah.

I was pretty banged up during the show. Although I had one point in Amsterdam when I was out of my mind, NYE was the most wasted in 2006 that I had been since the Trey/Phil show at Vegoose and the Radiohead show set at Bonnaroo. If you toss in the Playboy mansion, those were my Top 5 mind altering moments of 2006.

The show ended and we went into the hallway to pick up our stuff at the coat check. Nicky head into the bathroom as I stood in the hallway admiring all the photographs of previous performers. One wall had timeless pics of The Grateful Dead, Jefferson Airplane, and Janis Joplin. Another wall featured Beck and Neil Young. That's when I heard someone say, "Hey are you Pauly?"

It was 1:44am and I met Aaron from Portland. He said he saw me and the gang at Bonnaroo (you couldn't miss us with the celebrity heads) but didn't get a chance to say something. He had been reading the blogs for a while and finally got to meet me. It was pretty cool that we both decided to end the year (and start the new one) with My Morning Jacket.

Nicky and I walked down Geary Blvd towards Union Square. By then it was 2am and the bars were emptying which meant that thousands of drunken fiends were unleashed into the streets of San Francisco. Talk about a freakfest as hippies, street people, trannies, drunken yuppies, and hipsters flooded the streets. Two chicks in front of the Fillmore almost got into a fist fight after they argued over a cab.

On Geary, several people were passed out on the sidewalk while others were leaning up against parking meters as their soused bodies slugged over. One guy was carrying the limp body of his drunken girlfriend n his back as they passed us in the street. Another young girl was puking in between cars. And at the 24 Hour Jack in the Box, there was a line around the corner as drunks wearing tuxes and black cocktail dresses were waiting to buy a Jumbo Jack.

The new year began with me wandering the streets of San Francisco, shitfaced to the tits as I butchered the words to Highway to Hell trying to safely navigate Nicky and I back to our hotel, where we'd spend the rest of the nite polishing off that bottle of Moet.

At 7:50am PCT, I got a text message from AlCantHang that read, "still haven't slept in the new year." Yikes! I thought I tied one on, but that's why AlCantHang is a professional. Kids, you should not try that at home.
posted by Pauly at 1/02/2007 01:25:00 PM | Permalink |