Tao of Pauly

Just When I Thought Eli Manning Was a Cracker...

By Pauly
Hollyweird, CA


The phone rang. The super bowl ended five minutes earlier. It was the Joker calling from a party in Beckenridge, CO.

"How much did you win?" he asked.

"Almost $800," I said. "I won the coin toss and the over/under of how long it will take Jordin Sparks to sing the National Anthem."

Senor told me he knew I had it locked up when she dragged out the end. He was also shocked that his Pats blew a perfect season by losing to Eli Manning and the NY football Giants.

I bet the Giants +6 for the first half, and I locked them in at +13 for the game. Both hit. I've been luck for the NFL playoffs. I went 7-3 over the last four weeks for a nice score. Of course, I'm only betting small amounts of $200 max. That's my limit and I'm sure if I was betting higher, I'd end up losing most of the bets. You play for the rush, but over the long term, booking small wins is far more profitable than taking the huge swings with bigger bets.

"You make more money betting on sports than writing," joked Nicky. "Maybe you should keep at it."

But the NFL is over so it's onto the NBA and college basketball. Hmmm....... I really like the Jazz and the Magic on Monday night.

Anyway, it's Midnight. I've eaten salads the last two nights. The Giants are the Super Bowl champions. Gisele has dumped Tom Brady by now and has given that cracker Eli Manning no less than three rim jobs. And Nicky is sitting on the couch with Showcase and they're watching American Idol on TiVo and laughing hysterically every six minutes. I hear an Aimee Mann song playing in the background and I'm expecting it to start raining frogs all over Hollyweird.