Tao of Pauly

Week 1 Woes...

OK, I got my ass handed to me yesterday. First of all, Miami lost to Houston in a huge upset, which knocked me out of Zobo's Suicide Pool!!! I originally picked Denver but switched at the last minute. That makes another Week 1 exit in my last two suicide pools. I will not be doing one next year. Secondly, my Pick of the Week got upended. Fucking Brett "Cheesehead" Favre threw four interceptions and was too far behind in the second half to mount one of his infamous comebacks. Then of course, the officials blew several calls in the Oakland-Tennesse game last night. All in all, it was one rough week, and it's only Week 1! The only thing that saved me was baseball... Bernie Williams HR against the Red Sox to prevent a sweep and keep the Yanks in first place. Oh... the 49ers covered after they whooped the Bears. That was the only highlight!

Tao of Pauly Shitlist

1. Miami Dolphins & Jay Fielder... now I know why I really hate fucking Miami!! They royally screwed me and ruined my season. Let's recap... Ricky Williams fumbled which led to a Houston score. The kicker missed an extra point. Then Jay Fielder threw a crucial fourth quarter interception! Ughhh... it was an ugly 21-20 upset. And I'm out of Zobo's Pool!

2. Steve Spurrier & the Redskins Offensive Line... first of all Trung Canidate (our RB on Chronically Blunted) rushed for 46 yards in 10 attempts (a nice 4.6 avg/per carry). Spurrier called more plays for the two other RBs! Then of course, the O-line gets flagged for three holding penalties during three big runs for Canidate, each over 8 yards! And all of them called back.

3. Brett Favre... the golden boy threw 4 interceptions at Lambeau Field which led to a huge Minnesota lead in the first half. He made me look stupid in Week 1 after I went out on a line and put my money where my mouth is! That's the last time I pick the Packers for my Pick of the Week! I'm sorry Alea, but your Packers suck.

4. Officials in the Oakland-Tenn game... these guys blew several calls, including a TD that should not have been ruled a TD. The Raiders are usually a heavily penalized team (over 300 Penalty Yards combined last night) but when most of those calls could have gone either way (shady holding and pass interferrence penalties), you have to fault the officials. Especially in Week 1. The zebras were whistle happy last night.

5. Miami Dolphins & Jay Fiedler... I'm still wicked pissed at the upset, so I listed them twice! If I ever meet Jay Fielder again, I'm going to run up to him and shout, "You doofus! You cost me $760!!!"