Tao of Pauly

Happy B-day, Molly!!

Today, Molly, the most beautiful gal in the entire state of Texas turns 22!! Send Molly birthday wishes... here!

Wow, it's a special time and you are extremely mature for someone of that age. When I was 22, I was a Grade A fuck up. NYC actually had some real people and was not over run by hipsters. I was a museum security guard, snorting heroin, drinking tallboy Bud cans and smoking weed on my lunch breaks, hanging out in bars until last call with a sleazy collection of junkie jazz musicians and jaded artsits. The woman I was dating at the time was a typical tortured artist, who complained more about not being able to create, then actually working on her art. She was highly unstable and made me pay for every sin a man cast upon this Earth. Let me set the scene for you... she made Sylvia Plath seem as perky as Kelly Ripa. A dark cloud of misery hung over our relationship, which really fucked me up for a few years. It was a time in my life when I never looked past the next fix. Could you blame me? Man, I wish I was 22 again!