Tao of Pauly

Thank You Lindsay Lohan for the Increased Web Traffic

Dear Lindsay,

In the past two weeks, my readership has doubled, all because of your boobs. Whether they are fake, or not... I really don't care. But there are penty of curious folks, horny teenagers (and even hornier middle-aged suits), and big Parent Trap fans that insist on seeing what all the fuss is about. They hit various search engines, type in Lindsay Lohan's boobs and stumble upon my site.

Thanks to you... I have reached Page 3 of a Google.com search for your heaving bossoms. Last week I was ranked on Page 20 or 21... and in just six days, I jumped to Page 3. That means so much to me. Thank you so very much.

I also am shocked that I am getting international traffic as well... from the UK and Europe. It seems that your perky, over-sized mammory glands have also peaked the curiosity of plenty of European web surfers. Kudos to you... by the mere attrcation of your boobs, I am getting at least 2 extra hits... per hour!

Please feel free to contact me. I have a running series called: 11 Questions and I'm sure my faithful followers would love to have a chance to ask you questions. Wanted to include you in this rare opportunity. By the way, if you could send me an autographed picture for my friend (an un-named poker blogger, whom I won't embarass, but his initials are A.C.H.), I would certainly appreciate that!

Thanks for your new look, I am more popular than ever.

Sincerely,
Dr. Pauly McGrupp from the Tao of Pauly