Tao of Pauly

Chronically Blunted Update...

Chronically Blunted is the name of the fantasy football team that Dave Sheer owns and I was hired to be the General Manager and team physician. The winning team gets roughly $2500! Right now, we are in last place after an anemic 0-4 start. But things are looking up! Our weekly team score has improved every week, and last week, we almost broke 100 points for the first time. This Sunday we take on KG Express which is Gitler's team. I think this is our chance to end our winless streak!

Our team is not that bad because we have solid players. We just made some bad decisions. Our first round draft pick has been a bust so far... Donavon McNabb looked like shit the first two weeks of the season (which was the primary reason our team faltered early on). His poor play eventually led us to the decision to bench McNabb in favor of our other QBs (Jake Plummer and Vinny Testaverde). McNabbb's poor play also led to the racially charged comments from Rush Limbaugh last Sunday morning on ESPN, which exploded into a media frenzy, whereby Rush quit his job at ESPN. We have been trying to shop McNabb for a quality running back, but so far we have not had any serious inquiries. Last week, Monsters Inc. wanted to trade Torry Holt (WR) for McNabb, which we declined. This week Hell's Kitchen offered up a three-team trade proposal that would send us both Torry Holt and Olandis Gary (RB) to our team for our running back Charlie Garner. Again, we declined.

Anyway, after a month in the Lamot Jordan Fantasy League, I must say that the majority of the other team owners are a bunch of cry babies that have nothing better to do than to constantly get on the case of the Commissioner, David Lichtman. The guy is doing all the grunt work (for free) and he's had to make some difficult decisions, to keep the game fair and at the same time, maintain the integrity of the league. But greed seems to have tainted the good sportsmanship of the league. When you got each team forking up $355 to win $2500 plus other incentives... well that's a ripe formula for lots of bitching and moaning. From the e-mails to the posts on the league message board, all I can say is that most of these guys are first rate assholes, and I would never invite them into my house... ever. Again, I am talking about some of the other owners who I do not know. The guys I know (Gitler and his friends from Oceanside) are cool and I have no problems with them. But this constant bickering back and forth has taken the fun out of this league. Senor and I made the decision to step back and not get into the mud slinging. But it's pathetic at times... making grown up men look like bickering, spoiled girls on an episode of Sorority Life.

I feel bad for Lichtman, who has to put up with all this guff... for free! I have held more than one fantasy leagues in my day, and I can attest to the stress that the commissioner endures on a daily basis, every week, and over the length of a season. I think Lichtman should have gotten a discounted entry (or even a free one) for doing a kick ass job running the league and putting up with everyone's bitching. I sent him an e-mail yesterday, telling him he's doing a great job.