Wednesday's Politico Roundup: Iowa Down, New Hampshire Up Next

I love a good upset, except when my Yankees lose to the Marlins. Well, the people of Iowa spoke strongly Monday night and poor Dick Gephardt quit his run for the White House with tears in his eyes... like the sniffly nerd who thought he had a legitimate shot to win his high school's presidency... and then he lost miserably to the unambitious jock and even had less votes than Laukkin, the feral exchange student from Finland, who was a write-in joke candidate. Just when everyone was ready for a Dean-Bush showdown... John Kerry came out of nowhere to knock out Dean... similar to Star Wars... when Han Solo and the Millenium Falcon swooped in from the heavens and shot up Darth Vader's TIE starfighter, which was locked onto Luke Skywalker's X-wing fighter, speeding through a trench, ready to be blown to tiny inter-galactic bits (when Luke was ready to blow up the ghastly Death Star... using the 'force' of course).

The Howl of Dr. Dean!

Will Dean recover in New Hampshire? Most likey. Will Kerry and Edwards new-found support continue? It's still too hard to tell. But this next upcoming week, I expect Dean to improve upon his speeches and drop the "howling." Even the NY Times is questioning Dean's unorthodox concession speech... in which the hysterical and nefarious Dean sounded like a gangly girl with a slight lisp and bad case of acne who got dumped by her boyfriend... for her looser, dumber, sluttier, bigger breasted older sister! Indeed, Dean was angry, bitter, and frightening!

Make sure you read: A Concession Rattles the Rafters (and Some Dean Supporters). Here's my favorite part: "Howard Dean scared a lot of children last night..."

But as of right now... Dean Holds a Slight New Hampshire Lead Over Kerry.

Some related articles:

1. Still Crazy? is written by Hugh Hewitt from The Weekly Standard. Here's what he thinks: "The Democratic hopefuls can't keep their feet out of their mouths. Is anyone paying attention?"

2. Does Wesley Clark Have a Prayer? is written by Matthew Continetti from The Weekly Standard.

3. What happened to Ralph Nader? Check out: Nader and the Newmanites, written by Doug Ireland from The Nation.

4. Notes and Quotes from Campaign 2004

5. Are You Better Off? The Kitchen-Table State of the Union is written by Robert L. Borosage where he considers the state of the union as it looks from America's kitchen tables. 

Profiles of Democratic Candidates:

1. John Kerry
2. Howard Dean
3. John Edwards
4. Wesley Clark