Band Destroyer

How the Internet Destroys Jambands is an article written by David "Zzyzx" Steinberg. Here's a bit:

While this is most obvious with political discussions, it also comes up in musical discussion boards. If the majority of the vocal participants of a board don't like a song or a band or a jam it becomes received wisdom. The booing of the "Secret Smile" encore in Camden last year probably would never have happened without the weeks of people mocking the song on the Phantasy Phish message boards. It's not just songs that get bashed of course. One of the most unfortunate trends of the jambands world these days is how people use homophobia to mock String Cheese Incident. There are many things that I don't like about that band these days but a perceived lack of straightness isn't one of them.

Some of the better stuff he wrote was about the relationship with Phish and the internet. Check this out:

One of the lucky breaks that Phish got is that the Internet came along at the perfect time for them. With the exception of that one disastrous Colorado trip, they didn't even leave the northeast for the first six years of their career. It took them nine to get as far as the west coast. Yes, tapes circulated if you happened to know the right people and you could occasionally hear someone playing Phish in the parking lot of a Grateful Dead show, but it really wasn't until their eleventh or twelfth year until Phish really became known outside of a small cult crowd, just in time for the net to be at a point to help their growth. Those dozen years were put to good use. They had time to discover what songs worked and which ones didn't. "Lushington Miles," "Anarchy," and "Dear Mrs. Reagan" were dropped. The silly lyrics of the Junta period were replaced with the more intriguing songs of the Rift era. Chris Kuroda had time to become an amazing lightman and Paul Languadoc developed the ability to make any room sound amazing. It's not enough to have talent. You also need the time to hone your skills. There's reasons why so few Phish tapes from the early 80s circulate.

I got to meet Zzyzx a few times at various shows. Nice guy

Shits and Giggles

Russian exchange student feels right at home is a hilarious read. Here's my favorite bit:

To better fit in with her Cannelton High classmates, Kedrova has taken up many of their habits. She now smokes cigarettes and marijuana and also started sleeping around. A straight-A student in Russia, she now has a “D” average. She has also gained approximately 30 pounds since arriving in August and has gotten several tattoos. “As they say, when in Rome, do as the Romans do,” says the 16-year-old.

And who said Americans were fat, dumb, and lazy? And stoned to the gourd as well.

Colorado Rockies pitcher Denny Neagle was arrested early Friday for allegedly paying a woman $40 for a hummer is a story that made me chuckle. Here's the skinny:

Neagle was pulled over by police for speeding on a Denver street, at which time an officer noticed the pitcher's watery and bloodshot eyes and detected an odor of alcohol. The officer also noticed Neagle's pants were undone, and when queried about it, Neagle reportedly told the officer that he was "just getting comfortable." But a woman inside the car told police she had performed oral sex on Neagle for a fee of $40.

20 pounds of pot discovered is a sad story. Here's a bit:

Drug agents are investigating how a 20-pound bale of marijuana got mixed in with a truckload of watermelons that were delivered to the Good Shepherd Food Bank in Auburn.

Female of the Year


Please vote for me!

Please vote for Elsiha Cuthbert since I nominated her for a contest that Sigge from Norway is running on his blog. Last year I nominated Katie Holmes and she lost to Angelina Jolie. Oh well. This year, I'm hoping to steal this election like Papa Kennedy in 1960 and Papa Bush in 00 and 04. And I need all my fellow bloggers and readers to vote for her as many time as possible. Vote early. Vote often. It don't matter if you live in a blue or red state, just vote for Elisha.

Seven Days... Daddy's In

I just got more good news about the Holiday Classic in Las Vegas. Linda from Poker Works is going to be playing! She is the author of a poker journal where she talks about her job as a poker dealer at the Bellagio. I mentioned her before in my blog and posted parts of her write up of the night she was dealing to Matt Damon and Ben Affleck at the Bellagio.

Otis mentioned something to me the other day about inviting her. He sent Linda an email and she's in. We now have 28 confirmed players with a few maybes. And of course Daddy from Snail Trax is in! He called me today and said he was booking his flight. Sickness will ensue.

Wil sent me an email regretting that he will not be able to attend. His comedy show is opening the same night! We wish him the best of luck. Hopefully we can get him to play in the next event. In the meantime, I went scrambling to find a celebrity guest to fill in on short notice. I sent an email to the Hilton Sisters' PR person. I explained to them the history of the Hilton Sisters nickname for pocket queens and invited them to play in the tournament, specifically requesting Nicky, but I said "We'd be more than happy to have Paris and Tinkerbell."

I had this image of Al Cant Hang swigging back a double SoCo with Tinkerbell in his arms and then handing the little pooch over to Paris after I knock her out with The Hammer! Alas, I have not heard back from them. Not to fear, I already sent out emails to some of my favorite TV characters hoping that they might randomly show up at Sam's Town. That list includes Cousin Oliver from The Brady Bunch, Screech from Saved by the Bell, Rerun from What's Happening, Arnold from Diff'rent Strokes, and Greg Evigan from BJ and the Bear.

Monkey in the Window

"Do you think I'm crazy?"

She asked me out that question of the blue. I had been rambling on about an episode of Dawson's Creek that I had been watching in between inhaling early morning bonghits and playing a tournament on Party Poker. My cell phone was having one of those drop-every-fiftth-word moments. I thought she said, "Do you think I'm lazy?"

"Of course I do," I joked, "Get off your ass and do something about it."

"Would you be sad if I killed myself?"

I laughed again. Of course I got a mixed message. On my end I heard, "Would you be sad if I kissed myself?"

"Kissed, diddle, grope. Do what you want. I like to watch."

I was preoccupied. Multi-tasking is usually my forte but I was seriously distracted. I had pocket Jacks and some loose guy reraised me all in preflop. Should I call? Joey and Dawson were having one of their heart-to-heart talks and I love how the corners of Katie Holmes' mouth curl up when she's nervous. Should Dawson kiss Joey? I would.

"Something inside of me clicked. And I thought how I need to stop that lonely feeling that haunts me every day I walk down the street," she muttered in an unusally soft tone.

I'm not her therapist but I watched Dr. Phil three days a week and I got an A- in Abnormal Psych. I blurted out something that sounded deep and insightful, but I was pretty much making it up on the spot.

"Stop being paralyzed by some romantic notion that one day everything in your life is going to finally gel and the world will make perfect sense. That will never happen. The sooner you drop that, the better off you will be. I used to experience life through a window. Some days that window was dirty and I struggled to see the world through the filth. One day I smashed through the glass. I made a mess, and cut myself up pretty good, but I finally got to feel what it was like to be in the moment instead of watching someone else in the moment. Someday so will you."

"What if you encase yourself in glass all the time? And on purpose?" she persisted.

"Well," I said glancing at a bad commercial for Jimmy Dean sausage patties, "sounds like you're pretty much fucked."

Find Danny

Alea sent me a link to a thread on a Phish Phantasy Tour message board about a guy named Danny Clune, a Phishead from NYC who has been missing for almost a month. Visit the site that his family set up. One company anted up $5,000 reward to help out. Here's the related article Company offers $5G to help find missing man. Here's a bit:

A Manhattan-based pet products manufacturer pledged $5,000 yesterday to help find former Matawan and Point Pleasant Beach resident Dan Clune, bringing the total reward for information leading to the safe return of the missing man to $10,000. The Sporn Company, which employs Dan Clune's sister Kristen as an illustrator and graphic designer, offered the matching reward to provide a bigger incentive for people to come forward with information about Dan's disappearance, President Joe Sporn said.

Dan Clune, 29, was last seen around 2 a.m. Nov. 6 at Long Bridge Grill outside Sandpoint, a small, northern Idaho town where he moved roughly a year ago. He was reported missing Nov. 8.

Good vibes go out to his family.