Sigh...

She's really day dreaming about... me!
The Players:I was still dripping wet during the first few hands. Can't recall much aside from raising Al's big blind every orbit from the button! As always, a blast even though I lost a crushing $8, which is about the price of one drink in NYC.
Seat 1: Dr. Pauly
Seat 2: Maudie
Seat 3: AlCantFold
Seat 4: Bad Blood
Seat 5: Carter from Cubanlinks
Seat 6: Iggy
Seat 7: Lord Geznikor
Seat 8: Sean from Anistropy
Seat 9: Daddy from Snail Trax
Seat 10: Otis B. Dart
Ode to Al Cant HangHappy birthday, Senor Al No Puede Colgar! Hope it's a good one.
Always
Liquored
Content
Altruistic
Newfangled
Tipsy
Hangovers
Are
Never
Grand
After grabbing Derek from the depot, we went straight to the Boathouse, where Internet Celebrity (TM) Al Can't Hang was already in pre-bash preparations. And yes, by "pre-bash preparations," I mean "doing shots with Lewey, Big Mike, and others at 2PM. So with Pauly, Derek, Al, and myself all under one roof, how long do you think it took to get a poker game started? I think they measure frames of time like this one using the Heisenberg Principle, or Occham's Razor, or something. Needless to say, in less than 30 minutes, we had a game going.And this was my favorite part:
I have never seen guys drink like Al and his boys. Every time I turned around, they were drinking another SoCo shot. And another. And another. Oy. They're trained professionals kids, DO NOT try this at home.And of course, Al Cant Hang posted a write up of Blogger Borgata game and the Saturday fiesta. Here's what he had to say:
I was telling Pauly this morning on the way to the airport that Saturday happened exactly as I thought it would. I had talked to Al enough online, and had seen pics of him and his wife online that I felt like I knew them already. And so it was comfortable and cool. I expected to see a lot of drinking, hear some bar bands, play some poker, and not get nearly enough sleep for my tastes. That's exactly what I got. And it was fun.
I did make one guy cry with a horrible beat. Really really. Right there at the table. I made a move at a pot where this kid flopped his K with a bad kicker. He called my all-in on the turn after a long time. He flipped his cards and said, "I have the King". I just cringed. I said, "I just have Ace high". Just as I said it and flipped, the dealt put a lovely Ace on the river.More to come. I will be writing up the highlights and lowlights from Saturday. Stay tuned.
Young guy went completely ape shit. I attempted to apologize for the bad beat (as I was reaching over my newly formed stack of chips) and I eventually just walked away for a smoke. I found his girlfriend (who was sweating him the entire time) upstairs and I told her she might wanna go check on her man.
Later, I made Pauly honest-to-god, "I'm coming over the table", Hellmuthian (his words) mad. I bet the pot with absolutely nothing. A7s. A monster. JJ8 on the board. He thought and thought and eventually layed down the Hilton Sisters. It would have been all golden had I not pulled the ass move of the night. I flipped over my crappy hand. eek. Bad form Al....
....How to know it was going to be interesting? Lewey and BigMike hit the upstairs bar first thing and loaded up a buffet of shots. 4 Soco, 4 Jacks, two Irish Carbombs, and 1 Tequila, and miscellaneous beers. That was just the first round and it's around 1pm. 5 hours til the doors open....
....My blogger guests were truly impressive in my environment. It's not real easy to walk into a situation where myself and BigMike do doubleshots at a quicker pace than most drink their beer. BG slowplayed me by saying he was a lightweight. Don't buy the myth ladies and gentleman. He knocked back beer at a pace to impress certain Texan. Two minutes after meeting and shaking hands with Derek, he had a double Jack in him. Dr. Pauly, of course, had no problem hanging with the Soco and Yuengling. Carter showed up late with a completely valid excuse. He didn't bother to sleep the night before at the Borgata. He wasted no time getting into the swing....
...For the record, BigMike's tab had a total of 22 Jager Bombs. Good lord almighty...
"You might wanna check in on your boyfriend, I just put a bad beat on him."- Al Cant HangEditor's Note: You can read the entire write up via the Tao of Poker. I included some of the highlights and some of the better written parts...
The Players:3:31pm EST... I played my second hand in an hour when I found cowboys in late position and fired out a $30 preflop raise. I had two callers... Al Cant Fold and Grubby. I put Grubby on AK or 10s figuring that he would have come back over the top with any other big hands. I put Al on big suited cards or something like AQ or AJ. The flop: 6xJs9s. I opened up with a $50 bet. Al Cant Limp folded. And Grubby thought for a second and moved all in. That's when I should have folded. I was used to being bullied around by my fellow poker bloggers and the guys at the Blue Parrot. I had $80 already in the pot and $160 left. I foolishly called and of course the Grubster had JJ. He took my $240 in what was a $500+ pot. I was busted in the first hour! I looked at the time. How was going to last until Midnight with just $200 left? I only brought $500 with me out of my thin (Eastern European model-thin) cash bankroll. I wanted to cap out my loses in case I was on a bad run. I didn't want to have to go to the ATM but I pretty much decided that would have to happen if I lost my rebuy. I walked back up to the cage and got $200 in red chips. I took my seat again. Like that old Chinese proverb said, "Fall eight times, get up nine."
Seat 1: The kid (had his girlfriend sitting behind him)
Seat 2: The suit
Seat 3: The mechanic (and later Carter)
Seat 4: Al Cant Hang
Seat 5: Grubby
Seat 6: Boston Guy 1
Seat 7: Mrs. Hang
Seat 8: Boston Guy 2
Seat 9: Dr. Pauly
1. Thank God that wasn't me.When Al went out for a cigarette, he saw the kid's girlfriend and said something like, "You might wanna check in on your boyfriend, I just put a bad beat on him." Tragically funny, kinda like when a clown dies. Like a vicious storm, Hurricane Al Cant Hang terrorized the poor kid. He was lucky to still have the shirt on his back.
2. I can't wait to blog this!
Thanks Dr.Pauly, We had great time with you when we enjoying the show together! and thanks pauly, always you rescue us from our horrible seats! and HAPPY BIRTHDAY!Thanks Emi! I hope to see in Japan next year! My Japanese is not too good. I did not understand the rest of her entry. Maybe someone can help me translate it better? Here's what I understand:
My friend of Pauly lives in New York. His occupation is a good writer and artist or does such a thing it seems. As for him loving the Phish, he chased them 100 times or more. He is rather funny with Tao of Pauly. Of course because it's written in English, it's too long and hard to translate and you become tired, however sometimes when you read there is also a time of laughing. His humor is my favorite and best part of his writing.As I said my Japanese is horrible and this is loosely translated!! But you get the point. Thanks Emi!
He's friends with Zobo. As for encountering him for the first time, it was New Year's Eve 2002, the MSG Phish show. He is a very frank person, always with a smiling face. After the Japan tour of the Phish, he became friends with many Japanese. Funny person. First impression was a good impression in person. 2nd meeting was at the Miami Phish New Year shows. Although it was a long time since we met, for him my face was not forgotten. And he was the usual good person and the funny person when he talks We had bad seats of the third Miami show behind the stage, a high and fearful place. He found us and took us to his better seats. lucky!
As for 3rd meeting, it was August 10th of this year. We met in Great Woods with Senor outside the woman's rest room. It was pleasant. Knowing this type of person always helps... dividing the thinking which is pleasant, giving, when it meets. He's a very delightful person. Always, it was grateful, passed grateful.
1. Take the New Jersey Turnpike SouthSome folks have stone fountians, some have pink flamingos, some have gnomes or lawn jockeys... I'm looking for the fat hippy!! More to come.
2. Take exit 6 from the Jersey Tpike toward Pennsylvania Tpike
3. The New Jersey Turnpike turns into the Pennsylvania Turnpike.
...
8. Follow RT xx for approx. 6 miles.
9. Turn right on Gay Street. (there will be a 7-11 on the left)
10. Turn right on xxxxx Avenue.
11. Look for the fat hippy in front of the house
Look, I kindly asked Mr. Romeo yesterday to nicely remove my name from this REPLY TO ALL list. And today I found 4 emails from him. Now, I'm not in a good mood. All this nonsense will end today.Man, this guy sucks. I feel bad for our commissioner!!
Dear Mr. Romeo,
It is not unreasonable to ask you to simply erase my name from your emails. Frankly, you seem to be having problems... serious psychological problems from what I can tell in this short amount of time I have been bombarded by your idiotic assults on our commisoner and other members of this league. Who the hell are you to think that you can blantatly keep abusing us without any serious retributions?
I hope you seek help. Fast, before you damage to yourself and your loved ones. I don't know you and I never want to get to know someone like you.
Keep me off your email list of whiny complaints. Jeez. You are probably the worst possible person to have in a fantasy football league. You should be proud with your inadequacies, that is you are an annoying jerkoff who has nothing better to do with his life than complain about semantics.
I applaud Mr. Litchman and Mr. Kaye for their work. They do this for free and you could not pay me $2200 to have to deal with selfish assholes like yourself.
If you do win. I hope you use some of your winnings to get a hooker so you can end your decade long dry spell. Maybe finally fucking a $25 whore will do wonders for your inadequacies issues. And afterwards, I hope you use your remaining winnings to remove that stick that's wedged in your ass.
Sincerely,
Pauly... someone who's completely tired of your antics
Kuroda started working with the band after an offer from Trey Anastasio, vocalist and guitarist, to carry gear at local gigs around Burlington, Vermont, where the band and crew got started and still reside.Check it out. Thanks, Alea.
"I was taking guitar lessons from Trey, and he asked one time if I knew somebody to carry some gear locally around Burlington for like $20," explains Kuroda. "I was a roadie, but I wasn't prepared to travel or anything. Within a couple weeks, I was essentially part of the crew in an undefined way. I didn't realize how deep I would get into it."
His lighting career started a few weekends later in New Hampshire, when the prior LD took a mid-set bathroom break."
"There was another guy doing the lights. He stepped out for a minute. I jumped in to push the buttons on the tiny little light board, and I knew the songs from seeing the band 50 times in bars in Burlington. I knew, even then, the changes coming up. After that show, Trey called me and said, ‘You're doing the lights.’ I said, ‘I don't know anything about lights. I don't even know how to set up gear,’ and he said we'd figure it out together."
"Swish, I'm right fucking here!" - Ugarte scolding a player for continuously acting out of turnI had a great birthday yesterday. I wrote for several hours, played a few hands on Party Poker, ate dinner with my brother, then ventured off for a late night game at the Blue Parrot. Signor Ferrari had not hosted a game in several weeks. He pushed back the starting time a couple of hours and suggested that everyone bring a lax attitude this week, along with alcohol. Lots of it. Most of the regulars were back... Coach, Ugarte, and even Swish made the game. He was in town covering the Giants-Skins game and stuck around an extra day to play. Weirdness is the norm when the games get into the late hours. You can imagine what it was like when we left his apartment at 6am. At one point I was down almost $200 and left at 3am. I'm glad I stayed because I stormed back, saved face, and walked away only down $30.
The players:Man, I have lost so much money on Anaconda at the Blue Parrot that I could probably buy an entire bar in Southern Mexico somewhere, a place that Al Can't Hang and Mrs. Hang could vacation, and where the locals would shout out, "Senor No Puede Colgar!" everytime our favorite Socologist entered the premises. I cannot fold hands in Anaconda. I know better too. I feel like one of those battered wives, with two black eyes and a broken collar bone, who constantly runs face first into the fist of her pugilistic husband, unable to break free from the sadistic nature of life that we all crave, yet lack the self-esteem to walk away.
Seat 1: Joel
Seat 2: Om
Seat 3: Matt (first appearance at the Blue Parrot)
Seat 4: Signor Ferrari
Seat 5: Ugarte
Seat 6: Swish
Seat 7: Diane
Seat 8: Coach
Seat 9: Dr. Pauly
The Players:Over an hour, I dropped $19 most of it to a hand with AlCantFold. Party Poker's wild and loose tables at micro limits especially suck when you flop a set and still have five mentally unbalanced players rampantly jamming the pot with two gappers. I flopped four sets and only once did they hold up. Alas, I wasn't really there to win money.
Seat 2: HDouble (later)
Seat 3: AlCantHang
Seat 4: Otis
Seat 7: Dr. Pauly
Seat 8: Helixx
Seat 9: Iggy
Seat 10: Ugarte
"Don't walk behind me; I may not lead. Don't walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend."- Albert CamusAbout a year ago I almost hit rock bottom. I live to write and one September day in 2003, I woke up completely uninspired. That was not a nimble mischance. My once vast pool of inspiration had dried up. You could imagine the treacherous confusion that set in as I wandered around unhinged, unbalanced, and under-excited-about-life, surfing the tumultuous waves of postmodern society for several weeks while my mindset was tepid, at best. I was anonymously slumped at the end of a bar, muddied in a mid-afternoon buzz, when out of nowhere, I got up from my stool and walked out into the crowded street. I decided at that point to stop contemplating the big questions and start living. I'd push myself to write, to live, to travel, to explore, and most importantly... to make mistakes. Lots of them. I found something that day. Something I had been missing for several years. I discovered the intangible fearless attitude that I used to give me a glittering swagger when I walked so many years before. Within eight weeks, I penned two new novels, one of which I can proudly say, was my best piece of writing I every created. Coincidence? As soon as I shrugged off the possibility of failure, I found the energy and inspiration to start more projects. Some of them have panned ut, others fizzled out. But if I didn't take the first steps, I never would have figured out what parts of my vision could become reality.
In a mere gracious utterance, wholesome flowers wilt in the shadow of my wretchedness, for I am their executioner sending them to their inncoent deaths, tearing their souls in half to expose their barren existance. Memories of sunshine filled days can only be conjured up on idle afternoons as my rebellious prosperity privately sluaghtered my friends, signifying the end of a spree of heinous and grievous crimes. I can no longer comfortably sit on the grassy carpet owned by the pink-clad, malcontent heiress, constantly summering at the sea-walled estate on one of the royal islands, the largest one in the chain of Paradise, which is always overcast with envious clouds.I have no clue what I'm talking about either, so don't worry.
Trey Anastaio Band Setlist, 9.18.04, Austin, TXSaturday Gambling
Set I: Curlews Call, Money Love & Change, Push On til the Day, Ooh Child, Alive Again, Mozambique, Night Speaks to a Woman
Set II: Mr.Completely > Stash (instrumental & unfinished, Drifting, Makes No Difference, Last Tube, Way I Feel
Encore: First Tube
Photographers captured the scruffy-faced former prodigy strolling from jail dressed in a "New Yawk" shirt, a jacket and a baseball cap with "Pre-flop" written on it, an apparent poker reference. The young star is slated to play a celebrity poker tournament next month.So the Home Alone kid likes to smoke doobies, pop pain killers, and play poker. He can crash my party anytime. Does he have a poker blog too?
Belmont, Race 6: Derby Fever, Forest Rhythm, Devil's CommandI realized I'm betting on two horse with the word "bay" in it.
Arlington, Race 5: Captain Corelli, Rush Bay, Space Hero
Calder Race Course, Race 9: Lox and Kippers, Match Race
Monmouth, Race 9: Frisky Spider, Knight of Darkness
Woodbine, Race 10: Bottom Bay, Johnny Magic
Belmont, Race 10: Fiddler's Pride, Kitty Connection, Raffit
"A fashion is nothing but an induced epidemic."- George Bernard ShawTonight I play in the Aussie Million satellite on Party Poker. That should be one of the biggest events I ever played in online. I'm itching to go to Australia, which will happen if I come in first place. I was supposed to play on Wednesday, but due to techical problems, the tournament was cancelled.
Pauly I can't think of a better illegitimate child to have than you... I'm sure my girls would allow an addition to the menagerie as long as you follow Maudie's rules:Hmmm. Paris isn't exactly the kind of girl you bring home to meet Aunt Maudie. Now, that Katie Holmes... she's a whole different story.
- Smoking (all kinds) outside.
- Take out the trash.
- Do your homework.
And at least introduce me to the sluts ...er... girlfriends.
We at H.O.P.E. have a simple stated mission: to bring quality to the world of entertainment while working outside of the traditional network, record label, and studio structure. It is our "hope" that by voicing our feelings and concerns to the powers that be a better tomorrow, and not The Day After Tomorrow, is only around the corner for the good people of the United States of America, the world, and beyond.Yeah these folks are hardcore. They're slogan was: "Read a book. Don't write one!" Here's a little inside information... Paris Hilton never picked up a pen or typed a single keystroke in the construction of her book.
The coroner's office also listed focal pneumonia and "effects of multiple drugs" as other conditions contributing to the cause of death.Like I said. Super Freak was fucked up! Man, that's one helluva binge... gives me flashbacks of 1998.
"Toxicology revealed the presence of the following drugs: Alprazolam (Xanax), Diazepam (Valium), Bupropion (Wellbutrin), Citalopram (Celexa), Hydrocodone (Vicodin), Digoxin, Chlorpheniramine, methamphetamine, and cocaine," the statement said. "None of the drugs of drug combinations were found to be at levels that were life threatening in and of themselves."
I've got a challenge for you: What are your Top 10 specific *live* Phish renditions? (For example, "Wolfman's Brother, Coventry Day Two, 2004") No song may be repeated more than once. Venue and date required.That's a great idea, Rob. Here's my answers. Sorry it took me so long. I wish I had more time to really get into this idea! I'll elaboarte more soon.
1. Wolfman's Brother, 6.13.00, Club Quatro, Nagoya, JapanStay tuned. I'll be working on the best live versions... ever.
2. 2001, 6.14.00, Drum Logos, Fukuoka, Japan
3. First Tube, 6.16.00, Zepp Theatre, Osaka, Japan
4. Mike's Song, 7.17.98, The Gorge, WA
5. Piper, 6.19.04, SPAC, Saratoga, NY
6. Boogie On Reggae Woman, 9.18.00, Coors Ampitheatre, Chula Vista, CA
7. Harry Hood, 12.30.94, Madison Square Garden, NYC
8. Ghost, 10.31.98, Thomas & Mack, Las Vegas, NC
9. Weekapaug Groove, 10.22.96, Madison Square Garden, NYC
10. Divided Sky, 12.29.98, Madison Square Garden, NYC
"If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading."- Lao TzuMy mind has been cluttered with interpreting the plenty of shit that was shoveled onto my plate from others the past week or so. I woke up to a heavy day, my shoulders aching from the invisible load of mental baggage I had been slugging around. To remedy my frazzled mind, I wandered the streets of New York City in an attempt to figure those though questions out. I walked the noisome streets without any specific intended destination, sometimes sober, sometimes buzzed, allowing my mind to brainstorm solutions to the pressing problems. All the answers are inside of me. It just takes a while until my brain warms up and my courageous intelligence leaps forward and siezes control of the frantic breakdown in my ability to make proper decisions.
We apologize for the inconvenience caused to you.I don't know how some of you prepare for a big poker game or a tournament. For me, I try to have a mellow day leading up to game time. Since the tournament was scheduled for 11:15pm and I got up very early, I had a full day in which I did everything possible not to slip into an anxious groove. The half hour before the event started was when I began to psyche myself up. I was mentally prepared by the time I sat down. When the delayed happened, I had to wait without knowing the status of the tourney. That was taxing. I tried not to get too outta whack and lose my focus on the game, but I was agitated due to Party Poker's fuck up. I was treating last night like a fist fight. I was ready to viciously throw down and get my ass kicked. If I was going to lose, I was going to go down swinging. You didn't expect me to just fold away my chance at a shot at $1 Million Aussie bucks, did you? You can imagine the state of mind I was in when I was told, "You won't be brawling tonight."
We have refunded back the freeroll to your account and you can go ahead and register for the next week tournament. Our technical department tried hard to start the tournament, but due to technical constraints they were not able to start it and that is the reason why it was canceled and it was later posted on the lobby.
We thank you for your support and cooperation in this matter.
Al Gore won the election in 2000. George W. Bush cost Al Gore the election.Stop picking on Ralph about 2000. Without a third party's role in our government, our future will be continued to be ruled by first class assholes. Nader is trying to teach the Democrats a lesson and they're too smug to listen and include all those Americans who truly want a change in the entire system. And that's why Bush is going to stay in office. With 48 days left, there's no way Kerry can get his shit together to win this upcoming election.
No one is entitled to votes, they must be earned.
To say someone is a "spoiler" is to relegate all third-party and independent candidates to second class citizenship. American does not belong to two parties.
The Constitution does not mention parties.
This country had a rich history of third parties.
George W. Bush’s recount strategy in Florida cost Gore the election.
The deceptive butterfly ballot, which Democratic officials approved, cost Al Gore the election.
Katherine Harris-style purging of tens of thousands of non ex-felons from the voter roles cost the election.
A 5-4 U.S. Supreme Court stop of the recount cost Gore the election. (See Jeffrey Toobin’s book Too Close to Call).
Playing the "what if" game, Gore cost Gore the election in Tennessee, Arkansas, and each of the presidential debates.
Except for brief, progressive moments, such as at the convention, which helped his polls, Gore ran the usual, lackluster corporate Democratic campaign.
And they did. They voted for Bush, including more than 250,000 self-identified Democrats in Florida.
Moreover, a Democratic exit poll showed that Ralph’s votes came 25% from Republicans, 38% from Democrats, and the rest were nonvoters who would have only voted for Ralph.
In other words, more than sixty percent of Ralph’s voters would NOT have voted for Gore.
In New Hampshire, exit polls showed that Ralph "took more votes" from Republicans than Democrats, by a 2 to 1 margin.
If one accepts the flawed logic that suggests Ralph 'cost' Gore two states (New Hampshire and Florida), then it would also follow that Buchanan 'cost' Bush four states (Oregon, Iowa, Wisconsin, and New Mexico) in 2000.
CNN’s polling data said that if neither Nader nor Buchanan had run, Bush would have beat Gore 48 to 47 percent, with 4 percent who voted not voting.
31 years ago today, the future Mrs. CantHang was born in Bumblefook, NY. I still can't believe this lovely young lady puts up with all my degenerate behavior. You would think she could at least teach my how to play poker.Ditto!
A couple people have asked how a troll like myself landed such a fine young lass. Easy, we met at a company 'function' and she was a little tipsy. I kept her drunk for the next 18 months and she didn't sober up until the honeymoon. By then it was too late to get out!
Happy Birthday Princess.
"What do I know of man's destiny? I could tell you more about radishes."- Samuel BeckettMondays. I wandered around the city, half buzzed, half stoned, and half awake, and I talked to homeless kids and doormen and street vendors. They were as bored as I was. They had no answers and neither did I. Sometimes, I wandered over to the book vendors in the Village. They populated the Southeast corner of Washington Square Park near NYU and catered to the majority of students who needed books for various classes. Sometimes I visited the booksellers near Astor Place, by the Noguchi cube. I became friends with the older woman that ran one of the tables near St. Mark's Place. Her husband, Carlo, died a few years earlier, and I used to buy green tea off of from him. She did not continue Carlo's profitable side business of green tea distribution, but she gave me books at half price. That was a deposit. If I returned the book in the same condition I bought it, she'd give me the money back, or I'd get to pick another book. I always picked books that I wanted to read but not buy, or books that I had been curious to read and never did, or something I read once before but wanted to thumb through a second or third time. Obviously, I did not borrow books that I wanted to keep, just those I knew I'd be bummed out after I spent $15 for a new copy of Identity by Milan Kundera, and then it did nothing but collect dust on my shelf, because it was something that I would not have recommended to my friends, and I would have been embarrassed to give away a book that I did not enjoy. Carlo's wife hooked me up and I always wondered if she was going to sell books on the same corner for the rest of her life. She did not know what else to do. I assumed that books were her life and made her happy. I was shocked to find out that she stopped reading many years earlier.
"The surest way to corrupt a youth is to instruct him to hold in higher esteem those who think alike than those who think differently."- NietzscheI found out some unfortunate news this past weekend. My father's mother, my 95 year old grandmother, passed away. Sad, right? Here's the fucked up part. My father, nor anyone from his side of the family, bothered to tell me or my brother. They held funeral services and a wake... without inviting me. And here's the other doozy. Two of my father's sisters died of cancer all around the same time as my grandmother, and again, no one said a single word to me about that.