Tao of Pauly

11 Questions: May Edition

They are back. You ask the questions and I answer them. Here's the new batch of questons:

1. Bush or Kerry?
2. Who are your favorite directors, and why?
3. The famous Phi question.... If you were a tree... what kind of a tree would you be?
4. Do you have a lucky or favorite article of clothing when going to the casino?
5. If you were born in the 1920's, who would you go on tour with, how would you get from city to city, what would you be eating, and how do you think your outlook on life would be compared to today?
6. Who is going to win the Stanley Cup?
7. Which poker blogger drinks the most?
8. If you had a dog, what would you name it and why?
9. Where do goldfish go when they die?
10. If you could have sex with Katie Holmes, but had to give up poker... OR.... you could have sex with Elisha Cuthbert, but you had to give up writing... which would you do and why? (You have to pick one.)
11. What do you think... about how other people interpret the way you dress?

And now... the long awaited answers. Here we go!


1. Bush or Kerry? - Noonan, Seatlle, WA

Gene Bromberg for President! Alas, who do I think will win? Bush, by another close one. In the end, the Bushhaters will vote en masse for Kerry.... but middle of the road Kerry supporters will get gunshy and pull the lever for Bush. That' just how things work. Who would I vote for? Nader. Bush and Kerry are the same guy. It's like going to a bar and finding out that despite the hundreds of bottles of liquor behind the coolest bar in NYC... only serves Bud or Budlight and sometimes ODouls.


2. Who are your favorite directors, and why? - Haley, NYC

Woody Allen, Jim Jarmusch, Kevin Smith, Hal Hartley... to name a few off the top of my head. Woody for the comedic, yet philosophical inkling to his films, and he gives a foreign film edge, all the while set against the background of NYC. Jarmusch for the sincerity that he shows in his work, and he says what he wants to say. Kevin Smith's work resembles the type of pop culture influenced humor that I grew up with. Hal Hartley's films have a weird rhythm to them, with ambiguous characters, existentialist rhetoric, and a quirky sense of humor.


3. The famous Phi question.... If you were a tree... what kind of a tree would you be? - Jon S, DC

I would be the Old Post Office Tree in Mossel Bay, South Africa. It's one of the most famous trees in the world. A milkwood tree, that is over 500 years old, got it's fame when a Portuguese sailor hung an account of a shipwreck on its branches, enticing other sailors to leave letters on the tree to be delivered to other sailors heading off to other destinations all over the world. Alas, and they say Al Gore created the Internet!


4. Do you have a lucky or favorite article of clothing when going to the casino? - Armando, Sao Paulo, Brazil

No. If I fell weak to superstitions, it would disrupt and undermind the entire way I approach gambling, so I don't fall prey to specific superstitions. However, I do base a lot of decisions on gut feelings and hunches. If I have a bad vibe about a table or a casino, I'll get up and leave. I know people who have odd and quirky superstitions. One guy I know from Foxwoods, carries around pictures of his dead dog. Another guy has a lucky hat or lucky socks. Poker pro, Sam Farha, puts unlit cigarettes in his mouth. If he loses a hand, he throws the cigarette away and pulls out a new one. I gave my grandma a rabbit's foot once and she took it with her to Mohegan Sun and won a $3000 jackpot at the slots. Afterwards, she takes it with her every time she goes gambling.


5. If you were born in the 1920's, who would you go on tour with, how would you get from city to city, what would you be eating, and how do you think your outlook on life would be compared to today? - Modeski, NJ

If I was born in 1921, I'd be thirty in 1951... and I'd tour with Charlie Parker!! Bird... the sweet, melodious sounds of Bird! In a fuckin' second. From LA to Kansas City, from Chicago to 52nd Street... I'd be there to listen in awe, following him by the old school train and rail system, partying in the back car with the hip-refeer-toking horn players and playing cards with traveling salesmen in the bar car. I would be eating the local diner specials. Lot's of hash and eggs, the farmer's breakfast special, no fast food at all, and very little poundcake. I'd drink Ballantine beer and my outlook would be a little more sunnier. With the defeat of Nazism and Facism a few years in the past, the world was filled with possibilities in the early 1950s. That was when New York City exploded as the artistic epic center of the Western World after Europe was in the middle of reconstruction. Art, music, poetry, writing... all took form all over New York City, and I'd want to be in the center of it all, listening to the Beat poets in the West Village or drinking with all the Abstract Expressionists in the East Village or smoking up with all the jazz musicians uptown. Great question!


6. Who is going to win the Stanley Cup? - Edgar, Thunder Bay, Canada

Calgary all the way! Fuck San Jose. The Flames have played astonishing well on the road in the postseason, and if they can figure out how to win at home, and especially crucial Game 5... then they can go all the way! You gotta love the Flames captain, Iggy!!


7. Which poker blogger drinks the most? - Al Can't Hang, Phoenixville, PA

Tough question. You're all a bunch of drunk, degenerate gamblers! My money is probably on you, Al Can't Hang, after seeing all those pictures on your site... with Monkey Boy and scantly clad women, and read/heard all those stories... I'd give you the edge over Iggy. Not to say that Iggy is not a seasoned drinker. He has Guinness flowing through his veins. If he had to take a drug test, he'd pee Guinness. I'm sure The Fat Guy can put away a cooler filled with ice cold ones. Chris Halverson and HDouble are Scotch kinda guys. But y'all never saw the drunken binges of a nineteen year old Pauly. Some of my fraternity brothers can tell you about the hell I raised in the deep South in the early 1990s.... from New Orleans to Savannah, from Atlanta to Fort Walton Beach, from Biloxi to Greenville... I could put them away... I drank 24 beers in three hours once... and I used to be able to put away a fifth of Jim Beam on an off night.


8. If you had a dog, what would you name it and why? - Jenna, NYC

Flanders after Ned Flanders.


9. Where do goldfish go when they die? - Bill, Staten Island, NY

In the toilet.


10. If you could have sex with Katie Holmes, but had to give up poker... OR.... you could have sex with Elisha Cuthbert, but you had to give up writing... which would you do and why? (You have to pick one.) - Briana Buttons, NYC

I'd gladly give up both if I got to tag team them!! That's a tough question, but I'd give up poker and Elisha for one night with Ms. Holmes. And I'd give up pound cake all together if you... Katie and Elisha had an orgy with Monkey Boy, and let me tape it.


11. What do you think... about how other people interpret the way you dress? - Annie, NYC

Hipsters would think I don't dress cool enough to hang with them, which is cool with me. My clothes that look old... are actually old, decades old. And I didn't have to spend ridiculous amounts of money trying to look cool. I just wear old clothes. Someone once said, I dress for comfort. Which is true. Although I have been dressing "more like a writer" these days to quote some friends. Most of my clothes came from my travels all over the states... some of the nicer things I had from when I worked on Wall Street. Some of the swankier items came from a used shop in Seattle and San Francisco. My favorite shirt cost me $2 in Seattle. How cool is that? I don't send any money on clothes. It's my lowest expense.