Thursday, October 06, 2005

Bun in the Oven

The skies are dark and grey in my world. I just found out that another Hollyweird starlet was knocked up... and not by me. Check out what my second favorite NYC socialite, Mui, had to say about the latest dish about Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise. Even Al Cant Hang is pretty bummed out. He was the first person to clue me in.

I can best sum up my thoughts in this tearful letter I penned....
Dear Katie,

You blew it. You could have gotten knocked up by me and I would not have made you convert to my cult, er religion. Where I might lag behind Tom in boyish good looks, I make up for in height and girth.

First you ditch Dawson. Now this. We all thought this Tom & Katie thing was a nice publicity stunt, something concocted by your PR reps. We all went along for the ride like it was some really bad April Fools joke. But now, this joke has reached absurd levels.

My heart weeps for thee,
First the Yankees lose Game 2 and now this. Ouch. It's been a rough last 12 hours in my world. Time to seal the windows, turn on the gas, and read Sylvia Plath.

Blogosphere is going Katie & Tom wacky today. Here are the highlights:
The Tom Cruise & Katie Holmes Baby Aftermath (A Socialite's Life)
Tom Cruise Gets Katie Holmes Pregnant (The Superficial)
Katie Holmes' Virgin Birth (Defamer)
TomKat Stab Baby Shocker! (Gawker)
Celebrity Betting: Naming the Fetus (OddJack)
Tom & Katie Expecting a Baby (People)

No comments:

Post a Comment