Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Anal Starlets

I asked four random bloggers a serious question: Who would you rather have anal sex with? Anna Paquin, Kate Bosworth, Natalie Portman, or Scarlet Johannsen?

And here are some of their answers (anonymous of course):
#1: Kate for sure. Natalie Portman is "the girlfriend" type.

#2: Scarlet Johannsen, easy. Bosworth, as we've discussed, has a world class ass, but Johannsen is just built how I like 'em. Portman is overrated, and Paquin is a distant fourth.

#3: I second that. I'd make sweet passionate anal with Scarlet. I'd probably blow my chow inside her, and sip a cup of fine French roast coffee while it oozes onto the mattress. This is one snailtrack that I'd likely frame, and have mounted above the fireplace. Portman gets on my nerves, so I'd oblige her with a quickie no-lube anal express in the good old fashioned "hate fuck" manner. It may sideline me for a week, but the enjoyment I'd receive from it would certainly last a lifetime.

#4: I'd have to do Natalie Portman. She earned it years ago. That Anna Paquin would be interesting. I'd expect her to wear the long gloves from X-Men, tho.

To be fair to the women involved, you should have also created a used to be decent but now are chubby list.
  1. Anna Nicole Smith before Trimspa
  2. Kirstie Alley post latest donut rampage
  3. Delta Burke when she got huge
All of them were candidates when slim, but what/who do you do once they get large? There is a really tough question. The hot girls are easy.

Anna Nicole would be the hottest when not chubby, but combine the chubbiness with her annoying personality and she's out. Kirstie Alley is a disgustingly annoying fat woman. I couldn't do her thru a wall, with a blindfold, and with assurances that she'd "feel" like a hot chick.

I'd go with Delta Burke. If you want to call that the "best" option, well then she's the best option.
The masses have spoken. My take? Anna Paquin has the best BJ lips. I also agree that Natalie might be the best girlfriend, but she strikes me as the worst kinda of high maintenance (she's high but thinks she's low maintenance). Kate Bosworth is too damn skinny these days. Sure If this was two years ago right after the surfer chick movie, I'd say yes. But due to process of elimination, I have to go with Scarlet Johansen.

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